Alex Gold
Emperor
- Local time
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- Messages
- 2,045
- Age
- 26
- Pronouns
- He/Him
Lebule has a rich history of the appreciation of farts. A fart is generally considered an appreciation of the meal that the person has eaten. It is customary to try to fart after eating a meal to show your appreciation to the host or hostess who prepared the meal for you. It is generally understood that farting does not occur right after you've eaten a meal (unless you have a very fast metabolism that is ) but it is usually still performed as a formality. The louder and more aromatic the fart the better. You want the host or hostess to hear your appreciation of the meal but also don't want to inconvenience them by letting out a bad smell.
People from Lebule, known as Lebulites, do not understand why farts are considered hilarious in other parts in the world. As such they have trouble understanding fart jokes if they hear them in person by foreigners or online in foreign comedy shows. To them, farts are actions performed with pride and not something that is done shamefully. In fact, you are bound to hear some melodious farts ripping out when a couple goes out on their first date to a diner in Lebule. Of course Lebulites who go abroad have to deal with the hassle of covering up their farts when they hadn't had to do it before. To Lebulites farting is a normal part of human nature, and there isn't really a need to hide it. In fact, it's an action that deserves celebration.
As such, there has been a nationwide Farting holiday that occurs on March 31 and may also be celebrated on April 1 as well. It's a really big deal in Lebule. There is usually a farting competition in every town in Lebule celebrating the joy of farting. There's usually two main categories - The loudest and nicest smelling. The loudness of the farts are usually measured by pads that accurately measure the noise level of the farts in decibels. They are called fart pads and very popular among regular households as well were the competition is between family members where the winner usually gets bragging rights and nothing more. The major competitions has cash prizes though which can be very substantial in nature.
The other major competitive event - The nicest smelling one has to have judges that smell these farts and try to decide which fart was the most aromatic in nature. There have been times where people's farts have smelled like roses or chocolate which is always wonderful to behold. Of course these contestants have to decide which foods to eat to emit the best farts. Surprisingly, eating a chocolate doesn't normally emit a fart that has a chocolate smell to it. The foods eaten to produce certain smells may differ from person to person as well. All in all. if you're serious about entering this competitive category you'd need to do a lot of trial and error to figure out which foods would be best for you.
Of course there are other categories that are less popular but are still done in many areas of the nation. The longest that a fart can be held by a person and the most number of consecutive farts in a short period of time are two others. Farting competitions are taken very seriously in Lebule. So if you're a foreigner who feel like your farts are on par with local Lebulites, please take a good look at your ass and ask yourself if you want to be humiliated or not. Many foreigners have entered these farting competitions with little to no experience on their end thinking it would be a walk in the park and have always been left disheartened.
The farting competitions aren't the only things to look forward to come the end of March. There's also the annual Fart Orchestra. They usually perform many pieces that remind all of us about the melodic nature of farts and how beautiful they can be to hear. It's a nightly affair with more of an emphasis on brass and woodwind instruments as these instruments can reproduce the sounds of farts more accurately than some other instruments. However, string instruments and the piano are also used as accompaniments. There are many subtleties to a fart sound and string instruments and the piano help to produce these subtleties while the brass and woodwind instruments do most of the heavy lifting.
So, the next time you take a visit to Lebule, please make sure to fart after eating a meal to show your appreciation and please be as loud as possible ! You wouldn't want your host or hostess to feel like their effort was wasted, would you ?
People from Lebule, known as Lebulites, do not understand why farts are considered hilarious in other parts in the world. As such they have trouble understanding fart jokes if they hear them in person by foreigners or online in foreign comedy shows. To them, farts are actions performed with pride and not something that is done shamefully. In fact, you are bound to hear some melodious farts ripping out when a couple goes out on their first date to a diner in Lebule. Of course Lebulites who go abroad have to deal with the hassle of covering up their farts when they hadn't had to do it before. To Lebulites farting is a normal part of human nature, and there isn't really a need to hide it. In fact, it's an action that deserves celebration.
As such, there has been a nationwide Farting holiday that occurs on March 31 and may also be celebrated on April 1 as well. It's a really big deal in Lebule. There is usually a farting competition in every town in Lebule celebrating the joy of farting. There's usually two main categories - The loudest and nicest smelling. The loudness of the farts are usually measured by pads that accurately measure the noise level of the farts in decibels. They are called fart pads and very popular among regular households as well were the competition is between family members where the winner usually gets bragging rights and nothing more. The major competitions has cash prizes though which can be very substantial in nature.
The other major competitive event - The nicest smelling one has to have judges that smell these farts and try to decide which fart was the most aromatic in nature. There have been times where people's farts have smelled like roses or chocolate which is always wonderful to behold. Of course these contestants have to decide which foods to eat to emit the best farts. Surprisingly, eating a chocolate doesn't normally emit a fart that has a chocolate smell to it. The foods eaten to produce certain smells may differ from person to person as well. All in all. if you're serious about entering this competitive category you'd need to do a lot of trial and error to figure out which foods would be best for you.
Of course there are other categories that are less popular but are still done in many areas of the nation. The longest that a fart can be held by a person and the most number of consecutive farts in a short period of time are two others. Farting competitions are taken very seriously in Lebule. So if you're a foreigner who feel like your farts are on par with local Lebulites, please take a good look at your ass and ask yourself if you want to be humiliated or not. Many foreigners have entered these farting competitions with little to no experience on their end thinking it would be a walk in the park and have always been left disheartened.
The farting competitions aren't the only things to look forward to come the end of March. There's also the annual Fart Orchestra. They usually perform many pieces that remind all of us about the melodic nature of farts and how beautiful they can be to hear. It's a nightly affair with more of an emphasis on brass and woodwind instruments as these instruments can reproduce the sounds of farts more accurately than some other instruments. However, string instruments and the piano are also used as accompaniments. There are many subtleties to a fart sound and string instruments and the piano help to produce these subtleties while the brass and woodwind instruments do most of the heavy lifting.
So, the next time you take a visit to Lebule, please make sure to fart after eating a meal to show your appreciation and please be as loud as possible ! You wouldn't want your host or hostess to feel like their effort was wasted, would you ?