Challenge Submission My "quick" stop at Scubut's Bar and Grill

[Vasara Glyndark]

First off I gotta say I have been looking forward to coming here and ever since I heard about your wonderful food from the last hostage situation that took place there. My mother just raved about the food and the service. She especially loved your pulled Unicorn sandwich. She gave it three chef's kisses. She didn't enjoy being taken hostage though. I arrived there and I thoroughly enjoyed the all-you-can-you-eat buffet. I sampled a little bit of everything. My favorite was the spicy Pegasus wings. Your bathrooms are amazing. The cleanest I have ever seen. Your dwarf bathroom attendant Eduardo was amazing and the mints he provided were the best, especially after the Cu Sith Sheppard's Pie, so good but it is murder on your breath.

My only complaint as I waited in line to pay, some scuzzy bastard Troll barged in to rob the place which turned into a 48-hour standoff. I don't think the kids in the booth next to me will ever recover after seeing the Troll eat Eduardo like one of your divine Phoenix nuggets. Your staff was amazing, they did everything they could to keep the customers, and especially that Troll calm and fed free of charge while the Dark Elves attempted to resolve the situation. I will definitely come back again. I am most assuredly recommending your restaurant to all my friends and family.

P.S. Please send me the information about when and where Eduardo's funeral is. I would most appreciate it.