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- She/They
I know always that I am an outsider; a stranger in this century and among those who are still men. - H.P. Lovecraft
The flowers were dead. They did not even resemble flowers anymore, if the doll had not known they had once been roses she would not have recognized them. Thin, wilted, blackened and mold-speckled stalks resting in a glass vase full of yellowing water. The petals, once soft and vibrant, were now scattered dry husks around the the base of the vase on small table where it sat.
How long had she been staring? She could not remember. She knew she did not have a good perception of time. Her creator had often told her such. She would stare at what he would call the most mundane and simple things, lost in thought for hours before he found her and put her back to work cleaning his vast manor. She had not bothered cleaning in some time. The small table was covered in a thick layer of dust, and the silvery hints of cobwebs hung somewhere in the vast darkness above in the long hall. The stained glass that lined the far side were so coated in grime that little light shone through them. The doll could not even recall what color the long carpet that lined the hall used to be.
She reached down and plucked a stalk from the putrid water, the rot stark against the pale porcelain of her hand, and brought it up to her gleaming lavender eyes. It was so far gone that not even insects wanted any part of the dying tissue. Only mold and life she knew from the books in the manor library must exist, but were much too small for her to see.
Like a bolt of lightning a flash of memories shot through her mind—A man, grey-skinned and with only wisps of white over a spotted scalp where the hair used to be full, thick and black, seeming so very small in his vast bed, wrapped in dense layers of cloth that never seemed too keep the cold out, his once fierce eyes sunken, milky—
The doll dropped the stalk in a spasm of her hand, but made no other noise or movement. She stared at the coil of dying flesh where it lay on the vast, filth-stained carpet.
I'm looking for something even weirder than what I usually look for, but maybe someone will be interested in this!
I want to play a doll/automaton in a Victorian Gothic Horror/Lovecraftian setting. She has recently found her way outside of the manor in which she has spent her entire existence, and she has no clue how the world outside operates outside of what she's read in the manor library. What follows depends largely on the type of character you would like to play. I don't expect or want a GM, and I'm open to a few scenarios as long as I'm able to play this character mostly unaltered.
Here's a general sketch of her character:
- She can barely emote, often forgets to blink, and doesn't feel emotions in the same way a living person does. She also can't feel pain or touch in the same way.
- She is largely made of porcelain and glass; She has no sexual characteristics, outside of vague hints of what a living person would have.
- She is trying to find a new purpose after her creator died. She is now to using some of her experience to become a doctor to help others in the only real way she knows how.
- She was trapped in his manor for fifty years before her creator's death, and does not have much experience with other people or the outside world.
- Her creator was obsessive and abusive, and she has a hard time with people generally because of it, even outside her inexperience.
I have a few ideas that come to mind:
- A slow-burn toxic romance between YC and mine, in which they take advantage of her but teach her about the world outside the manor. This wouldn't be anything too too grim.
- YC is someone else strange, another person failing to meld into society for one reason or another, and they help each other.
- A more slice of life focused RP based around MC trying to find normalcy as a doctor, potentially in conjunction with the first idea. She tries to open a practice with YC, or maybe under YC, but constantly struggles with the day to day. This could be it's own idea, too, with the RP having a lighter tone overall. YC could just be trying to help her and the two of them grow closer that way.
- A noncon-centric RP in which MC struggles to find her footing after leaving the safety of the manor. I love truly horrifying creatures of all sorts, but YC doesn't need to be a monster for this idea if you prefer. YC is injured, or cursed, and they force her to ply her trade on them while pushing themselves on her, or something like that.
I'm open to hearing whatever ideas you might have for this, too! I'm flexible. The specifics of the setting and your character are also completely up for discussion. I'd love to come up with something we'd both equally love to write out. I'm more than happy to play as many characters as we need, and to write my share of the setting details.
The fact she doesn't feel things like a human would and doesn't really have sexual characteristics of any sort probably makes this really niche, but they are sticking points for me. I figured I'd put this out regardless and hope for the best!
I'm very much a story first sort of RPer, and I'd like for this RP to at least have as much story as smut. I imagine this plot as something like 25 / 75 smut to story, with a focus on MC adapting to the outside world. I am fond of quite a few unsavory kinks, but I ultimately like building up fear and tension over jumping to sex for it's own sake. I'm fine with most of the following kinks being omitted depending on the plot. This does not need to be a smut-heavy plot by any means, I'm far more interested in playing this character in a slow-paced RP of some sort.
I always love to include: Charming but terrifying partners, Monsters, Bondage, Punishment, Outercourse, Dub/Noncon, Humiliation (Not sure how that would work in this case), Rough Sex, Sizediff.
I will never include: Scat, Incest, Mind Control ( Including hypnosis and drugs that alter MC's personality), Impossible Sex (bulges, inflation, etc.), Hyper, Diapers, Scentplay, Transformation and Vore.
About Me:
I've been writing in PbP RPs for over half my life now, and It's easily my favorite way to RP. I enjoy writing as a hobby, so text-based RP tends to be my pref. I love setting the scene and getting into my character's head just as much as taking part in the game proper. That being said, I'm not that big on grammar or post length as long as it feels like the other person is as into it as I am. I'm not the best writer, and I've had my share of embarrassing typos, so I only really ask that you double-check a post for major errors.
I'm trying to take things slower so I don't overwhelm myself as far as posting freq. I would like to post every other day but as long as it's at least once a week I don't mind. Sometimes I need to take breaks for irl reasons, but it should not be more than a week going forward. I will make every effort to warn my writing partner when this happens.
Thank you for reading, feel free to PM me if you're interested!
