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☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆
WHO AM I ────────☆ you can call me star
☆ i'm currently between 20 and 25
☆ i identify as bisexual
☆ i've been roleplaying for over a decade
☆ i range between 1 and 5 paragraphs every response, but average 2 or 3
☆ beside the occasional typo (which happen to all of us), i use proper spelling/grammar/punctuation
☆ depending on my motivation, i can reply as often as several times a day, or as rarely as once a week
☆ i am a full time student with a part-time job, so sometimes, i am just too busy to write
☆ while i'm not the most outgoing person, i'm happy to chat and plot ooc
☆ i am ghost friendly; though i'd prefer you let me know if you lose interest, as someone who struggles with both motivation and anxiety, i completely understand if you can't
☆ if you do ghost and/or lose interest, and later want to pick the roleplay back up, feel free to reach out!
☆ at the moment, i'm looking to play exclusively bottoms, though rest assured, they won't be boring doormats, even if they are submissive by nature
WHAT DO I EXPECT ────────
☆ i expect my partners to write at least one solid paragraph per character every response
☆ i expect my partners to reply at least once a week
☆ i expect my partners to be comfortable playing top/dominant-leaning characters
☆ i expect my partners to put as much effort into my half of the roleplay as they do theirs
☆ i expect my partners to use proper spelling/grammar/punctuation (at least while ic)
☆ i expect my partners to help me plot
WHAT ARE MY KINKS AND SQUICKS ────────
☆ a comprehensive list can be found here, on my f-list
☆ favorite kinks/themes include: taboo relationships, humiliation, hair pulling, age gaps, pinning, light bondage, throat-fucking, virginity, multiple rounds, photographing
☆ hard no's include: any form of vore, furries, extreme pain/gore, scat, rimming, footplay, bloodplay, macro/micro, fisting, bimbofication
THE STORYLINES ────────☆ WISH YOU WERE SOBER
| drunk sex | internalized homophobia | relationship development |
In his small, conservative, traditional little town, YC is the king. Captain of the football team, the most popular boy in school, a college student who's fully expected to get some bullshit business degree and then take over daddy's company, regardless of whatever "fleeting ambitions" he may have in his youth. He has his pick of friends and girlfriends alike, and has more or less been granted a universal invite to every party hosted. And he loves it. He does, really. It's great, being considered the cream of the crop. All he has to do is keep playing this part, and he's pretty much set for life, guaranteed a future with a white picket fence, a lush job, and a beautiful wife who will eventually give him equally successful children. It's all that he should want, and it'd be so easy to let himself get it...
...so why does his every instinct drive him away from the path that's been laid for him? Why does he find his gaze wandering in the locker room, why does he feel his heart jump into his throat when a member of the opposing football team takes off his helmet, why does he find himself loathing every girl he kisses or fucks? He hates himself for it, and does his best to repress every errant desire, but it feels like the harder he tries, the stronger they get. Still, even as they threaten to overwhelm him, YC refuses to acknowledge them. He's not gay. He's just confused. He just wants to rebel, or something. That's all it is. All teens want to rebel. That's—That's just how his mind is choosing to rebel. Right. Of course. The worst part? The focal point of all these stupid, unwanted, painful fantasies is MC.
If YC is the king, MC is the lowest of the peasants. He's poor as dirt, and instead of possessing a healthy interest in sports or science or math, the sort of interests YC's been taught that boys are meant to have, MC is an artist at heart, his clothes stained with paint and his fingers darkened by charcoal. The worst part? He's the only openly gay boy in town. YC has spent years watching him be harassed for it—stood by and let it happen, participated on a few occasions, even though it made his stomach twist. He's quite literally the opposite of what YC is allowed to want. Not that it matters, because YC doesn't want him. Don't be stupid.
He doesn't want him at all. When he crosses paths with MC at a party, drunk out of his mind and hating himself especially hard, and it ends with him pulling MC off to some dark corner to hook up, that's just a drunken mistake. Everyone makes them. When he spends the next few days unable to scrub the image from his mind, unable to forget the way MC's skin tasted and how it felt to hold his hips in his hands, he's just stewing in his regret. He's not relishing it, and he's certainly not longing for it. And when his resolve cracks, and he finds himself reaching for MC again, and again, and again...
...well, he'll find an excuse for that eventually.
☆ HOT FOR TEACHER
| age difference | forbidden relationship | power imbalance |
It's been a long time since YC, a college professor in a small town, was happy. Not that anyone would know, looking in from the outside—he's good at faking. He loops his arm with his wife's at events, smiling, and pretends he doesn't sleep with his back facing her, every bitter, hateful word she'd spit at him ringing in his mind. He teaches his students emphatically, answers all their questions patiently, and pretends his back isn't breaking from the weight of trying to educate a generation of students that couldn't seem to care less. He goes to bars with his coworkers, laughs at their jokes, and pretends he doesn't know that they'd all forget about him in an instant, if they weren't all tethered to each other by their jobs. It feels like there isn't a moment in his life where he isn't pretending.
He's depressed and empty and cripplingly lonely, and maybe that's why MC catches his eye. Because, as tragic as it is, he sees a kindred spirit in MC, who sits in the back corner of every class with his head down and eats at an empty table every lunch and spends every free period in some secluded nook in the library. There are bags under his eyes and his nails are chewed down to nubs, and YC knows that MC is just as isolated and sad as he is. He knows, just as surely, that MC has a crush on him. He wouldn't be the first student, and he's just as horrifically bad at hiding it as the others, guilty of blushing whenever YC calls on him in class and nervously playing with loose threads on his clothes on the rare occasions that they chat.
It's his responsibility, YC knows, to pretend he doesn't notice. It'd be remarkably wrong for him to take advantage of MC's interest; not only is MC younger than him by a substantial enough amount, but he's one of YC's students. The inherent power imbalance those factors created would make any relationship between them wildly suspect, not to mention that YC's married, however unhappily. While he may let himself guiltily fantasize about the prospect, YC knows he can never actually pursue MC.
But then...he's so lonely. All he wants is to connect to someone who feels like he does, to find someone who makes him happy. What's so wrong with that? And lord knows that MC could use some support, guidance, and love; YC could provide all of those things, couldn't he? He knows he could. They could be good for each other. Shame burns in YC's gut like a roaring fire, but still, he finds himself asking MC to stay after class, finds himself talking to him far more personally than he ever should a student, finds himself reaching for his hand...
...and, soon enough, finds himself doing so much worse.
☆ GREAT IMPOSTER
| fantasy setting | infatuation | magic |
YC, an incredibly skilled magic user, has been wildly in love with MC for years, which is saying something, considering they've never formally met. Instead, YC has always been an outsider in MC's life, an observer watching from afar, longing and yearning and fantasizing. Understand, this obsession doesn't come from a place of malice. He has no desire to hoard MC to himself, or to prevent him from pursuing any of his dreams. He doesn't want to covet him like some grand prize or treasured pet, not at all! He loves seeing MC thrive in his community, and nothing makes him happier than the thought of MC achieving all of his goals. All he wants he wants is to be a part of MC's life, to love him and be loved by him in return. He wants to support him, to nurture him, and, yes, to occupy his bed, each and every night.
A whole variety of factors have prevented YC from even properly introducing himself to MC, let alone forming the sort of relationship he desperately wants. The most recent is MC's partner, who he's been with for a few years. In all his life, YC had hated very few people, but MC's partner is most certainly one of that number. He knows that it's not fair. It's not as though MC's partner is a bad person; he's a good, honest man, who dotes on and cherishes MC the way he deserves to be cherished. That, YC supposes, is the problem: he's playing the role that YC wants so desperately to play. But he knows that MC would be miserable if anything was to happen to him, so despite his jealousy, YC doesn't interfere, even when the partner eventually proposes to MC. He watches them together, and his desperate desire grows stronger and stronger.
And then, the universe seems to drop an opportunity right in his lap: MC's partner is injured. Specifically, he suffers a fairly severe head injury. He'll survive, but he's going to be comatose for a while, and there's no telling what his mental state will be like when he wakes up. Just like that, MC's struck by a truly wonderful idea. He'll take the partner's place. He can take his comatose body, one of these nights, when it's unguarded in the infirmary, and contain it in some secure place. Using small bits of his DNA—hair, nail clippings, the like—YC can create a magical potion/spell that allows him to take on the partner's appearance, and he'll only have to refresh it once a month at most. Any changes in his behavior will be excused as the result of the partner's head injury. Seamlessly, he can slide into MC's life, and fulfill his dreams without putting MC through the pain of losing his partner. This is the best possible outcome, for both of them. This way, they both get what they want.
Deep down, he knows it's wrong. This sort of manipulation is a deeper betrayal of MC's trust and autonomy than ridding of his partner entirely would've been. But the guilt, the shame, it seems so small in comparison to the euphoria he feels when MC comes into the infirmary the next morning, and throws his arms around him. And later, when he has MC in bed beneath him, writhing and moaning and somehow even more beautiful than he imagined, YC can't find it in himself to feel sorry.
☆ CAGED BIRD
| fantasy/historical setting | manipulation | slavery |
YC is a knight, and a damn good one at that. There are many things that make him so good at his job, and they go beyond simply being a capable fighter and strategist. Truly, his greatest gift is his ability to tiptoe around the king's vicious temper. That temper has plenty of adept servants and loyal knights flogged or even killed for minor indiscretions, but never YC. YC knows precisely how to toe the line, how to keep the king satisfied with his work without drawing too much of his attention. Unfortunately, this means that he often finds himself working in relatively close proximity to the king, as one of the few knights the king trusts to be not only reliable but to not aggravate him, and as a result, he bears witness to much of the king's cruelty.
The concubines get the worst of it. Lord knows the king has a voracious sexual appetite and some particularly cruel tastes. How many beautiful, bright young men and women have YC seen go into the king's chambers and come out shells of their former selves? How many concubines has he seen die, whether as a result of the king's brutality or their own desperate attempts at escape? Too many. Enough that he's almost desensitized to it. However horrible it is, it's easier to try and convince himself believe they're not people. Then it doesn't make him want to vomit, seeing them emerge from the king's chambers bruised and beaten and broken, or worse, carried out, limp and unseeing. There's nothing he can do for them, so he may as well look out for his own mental wellbeing by creating that disconnect.
MC is one such concubine. He's new, brought from a distant archipelago. He's suffered his entire journey, and now, he's suffering even more as the king's favorite bedmate. He sees YC around frequently, and in his eyes, he sees something unfamiliar: sympathy. However YC tries, he sees MC as a person, and a person that's unfairly suffering. MC sees it...and, just as surely, he sees that YC is attracted to him. In that attraction, YC sees an opportunity. He'd never be able to escape on his own. But, were he to ensnare the knight, and convince him to orchestrate his escape, he may just manage it. He could leave this horrible place behind, and return to his home. And if YC tried to accompany him? Well, MC could kill and leave him.
That sort of ruthlessness, truly, wasn't in MC's nature, but he didn't see any other option. If he didn't get YC's help, he'd never get out to begin with, and if YC returned with him to his home, he'd always have a reminder of the terrible things he'd endured. Things would never go back to how they were. No, YC had to be disposed of, once he'd served his purpose. MC would be merciful. He'd make sure he never saw it coming, never knew that the boy he'd sacrificed everything for would slit his throat the moment he didn't need him any longer.
And so MC sets about his plan, relying on the most powerful of human urges to draw YC to him—lust. He holds YC's gaze while the king feels him up in front of all his attendings, noting YC's seeming inability to tear his eyes away from his parted lips and rosy cheeks. He spreads his knees when he catches YC's gaze roaming him, head tilted, eyes inviting. He brushes the gentle curls of his hair off his shoulders, fingertips ghosting his collarbone, and his heart thrums when YC's gaze follows his hands. Slowly, he's drawing YC in, deeper and deeper...
Until YC can resist him no longer.
☆ TEACHER'S PET*
| age difference | manipulation | power imbalance |
What happened to James was a senseless, tragic accident. That's all. At least, that's what YC tells himself as he's scrubbing the blood off the floor, loading the body in his car, posing it to be found somewhere. He loved James, as wrong as it may have been, what with him being a professor and James being one of his students. How could he not? James was intelligent, handsome, charming—he had such a bright future ahead of him. YC loved him enough to plan the entire life they could've had together, and to covet every paper he turned in, just because they came from him. He loved him enough to break into his dorm and install spy software on his laptop, so he could watch him whenever he wanted. He loved him enough that the thought of losing him drove him crazy. He had never wanted to hurt James. And yet, here he was, attending the memorial and staring at James's empty seat in his classroom. God, how had things gone so wrong? YC will never love again. not after that loss.
...At least, that's what he thinks, until MC walks into his classroom for the very first time. He's a brand new transfer, beautiful and bright and delicate. In MC, YC sees a new opportunity. He made mistakes with James, but he could get it right this time, have the love and the life he knew he deserved. The universe practically dropped a second chance in his lap; how could he turn it down? Then, a hitch in his plan: it turns out that MC not only knew James, but was James's boyfriend, the very one YC had always envied. James's death had caused him to transfer, hoping to learn the truth about his boyfriend's death. It seemed he didn't buy that James's death was an accident, which the rest of the world accepted without question. While this throws YC for a loop, he's quick to process and justify it.
If anything, this is more reason for him and MC to get together, right? He owes it to MC, doesn't he? After taking James away from him, it's his responsibility to help MC move on and find happiness after his loss. It's what James would want: for his love to be able to go on with his life. They're both getting a second chance. It's almost beautiful, if you think about it.
*If you'd like, we could potentially discuss YC having James captive instead, and wanting to "complete the set," as it were, by getting MC too.
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