He tried to recollect his memory, but his head was a blur.
The bright flickering spheres around him faded, and he slowly recovered his eyesight.
"Where am I? How did I get here?" he thought, but there was nothing familiar about the strange world around him.
Just moments ago, he was fighting a Mountain drake which threatened the people of the Ice children village up in the mountains.
And was about to deliver the final blow to it when he suddenly couldn't move his body and got engulfed in these bright spherical bubbles which blinded him and put him to sleep.
Gunnar didn't know how long he was out, but by the time he woke up, he was in an alien world...
Huge, high stone things surrounded him, and he didn't like it at all!
"By Odin! what is all this!" He murmured in utter confusion.
Disoriented as he was, trying to take everything in, human-like beings hastily passed him by on this solid, black-and-white striped surface uncomfortably close and seemingly unphased by his appearanc, it quickly started to get on his nerves.
"Get off the road, freak!"..." Yooo! it's been Halloween already, man!"..."Mommy, look! a caveman!"
Gunnar couldn't believe his ears, one would usually think twice before opening one's mouth to him like that, and if it weren't for the sudden panic behind him, he would have started swinging!
"NOOOOOOO!! ABBY, GET OFF THE ROAD!!!" A female-like figure in an apparent state of panic screamed at a tiny, white-haired humanoid in the middle of the hard flat surface.
Apparently, the dwarf had lost a precious animal-shaped item while crossing and had freed itself from its attendant to retrieve it.
"Must be a powerful relic that cannot be lost," He thought, but then he noticed the fast-approaching, strange, roaring creature in the corner of his eye and raised his brows in surprise when hearing its sudden high-pitched monstrous scream! "HOOOOONK!!"
Within seconds, Gunnar realized the dwarf was in mortal danger, about to be attacked and killed by the charging beast trying to slow down by making loud noises with its odd, black, round-shaped feet...
Gunnar was merely a few feet away and jumped in front of the dwarf, blocking the charging entity without hesitance, pulled his great axe from his back, and raised it high to prepare for a devastating counterattack.
"BEGONE DEMON!!" He shouted as he swung his axe down with deadly precision, hitting the semi-truck through the middle of the hood with such force that it stopped entirely and was dead in its tracks!
The sudden lack of forward momentum combined with the sheer mass of the semi caused it to fly up and over the two.
Tons of debris flew around as the semi went airborne, doing multiple somersaults before landing on its feet again, coming to a complete stop by crashing into a building.
It was absolute chaos as hundreds of people started screaming, panicking, and running, which confused Gunnar even more, for he thought he had demonstrated his might to slay the beast and was expecting nothing less than a cheerful crowd but........A gentile touch...a tiny hand grabbing onto his finger...
He looked down at the light-haired little person clamping onto one of his finger with her tiny hand and couldn't suppress a smile; she lived.
The mother rushed in, firmly grabbing the infant with one arm while grabbing Gunnars hand with the other, *Come! Quickly! Before the cops arrive!* The female urged him.
"What kind of creature is a cop?" Gunnar asked excitedly, hoping for a strong opponent to fight.
"Don't be stupid! Come with me! now!!" The female urged again, louder this time which pleasantly surprised Gunnar, for he has always been a sucker for strong women.
And these so-called "Cop" creatures must be powerful for her not to want to stick around.
"But I want to see the cops!" He told her with a disappointed look on his face.
"Are you an IDIOT?! Do you want to get yourself arrested?! come on already!!" Rendered speechless, he reluctantly tagged along, swinging his great axe over his shoulder, wondering if "being arrested" meant dying a glorious death in battle...
Gunnar sat on an extraordinary but comfy thing they call "coush" "Couch!" Abby corrected him as she giggled, sitting on his lap and playing with his goatee.
It made him somewhat uncomfortable, but he didn't have the slightest idea what to do or where to go from here, so he had to settle for his current situation.
He must have spent a good thirty minutes examining the magic wonder box this tribe calls "T.V, " which could show you the past as he watched a news feed about what happened earlier.
He felt relieved that a strong female dared to stand up to him, guide him, and even take him into her home! Something that's not commonly practiced in his tribe for respect and trust had to be earned!....wait! he did guard the little runt against getting eaten by what he later learned was a "truuk" "Truck!" The little runt corrected him again, forcing something like a faint smile on his face.
"So I earned her respect," Gunnar silently boasted to himself, "I might have found my new shieldmaiden" He could already picture their marriage in his mind.
"Hey! want some coffee and toast? I don't have much since I got...distracted... before getting the chance to buy groceries."
The "Strong woman," who goes by the name "Allice," walked in from the cooking area bearing gifts on a plank containing perfectly shaped bowls with tiny ears.
And those lightly seared, perfectly cut chunks of...bread? "That's bread?!"...
"Of course, it's bread! What else would it be?.... you're not from around here, are you? And what the heck happened back there with that truck? I still can't believe what I saw..."
Not quite the reaction he expected..."Oi! this is how your tribe shows gratitude for saving one's kin?" He felt seriously wronged...she noticed and softened her voice, realizing how anxious she was. "I'm sorry...I didn't mean to upset you...Thank you for keeping her safe."
She handed him a bowl with the ear facing him, but he failed to understand how to accept such a gift and rudely clamped on to the ear, which snapped right off, causing the hot fluid to spill all over his lap!
"BY ODIN! HOT! HOT, HOT!" Good thing Abby got off his lap to play with her dollhouse, for the startled Gunnar, jumped up and raged around the living room, breaking everything in his path until....*SLAP!*...He froze, placed a hand to his cheek, and gazed at the angered woman with dull eyes...
"What the hell, idiot! You broke half my house! What the literal fuck were you thinking! Who's going to pay for all this damage, huh?! I'm broke enough already, damn it!!"
And that is how the two met.
Gunnar felt guilty for the destruction he caused in the shieldmaidens hut and promised to make things right again but didn't know how.
Also, he did not carry any gold to pay for the damage; who carries gold when hunting dragons anyway?
Then there was also the issue of the recent events in the city center.
Apparently, all the humanoids here carry their own little magic boxes, capable of recording the past, and Gunnar learned what it meant to go...viral...
Amateur footage of his epic battle had spread all over the planet, but luckily, none showed a clear image of his face.
Gunnar could not be more proud of this, but Allice kept him in line, and he had grown on her big time!
As solid and mighty, he was a brute, so tender and weak he felt around Allice, his lovely shieldmaiden though, she would have none of it; she just wanted coverage for her stuff... at first.
Later, she would melt for the gentle giant who wasn't Subtle about anything.
After many heated debates, they finally agreed it would be best to change his appearance to keep him out of trouble.
The goatee had to go; his ginger hair would be dyed, his armor had to be replaced by regular clothes, and his weapons hidden carefully.
Gunnar experienced an emotion he didn't know existed...sadness...
But he agreed, and voila! He was no longer Gunnar the red, but Steve the janitor...for he agreed to earn his way out of debt by accepting a job where Allice worked, a vast storage facility at the city's edge.
Allice worked there as a forklift driver and had to make long hours to even get by each month; her late husband, who also worked there, had passed away three years ago under mysterious circumstances, and she was determined to get to the bottom of it.
All that was lacking was any possible clue whatsoever, but she never stopped digging around, carefully not to piss off the wrong people.
First day on the job andGunnar,...Steve had already got reprimanded for chasing a coworker with a mop for looking at him the wrong way, but a vicious stare from Allice quickly set him straight, and she forced him to promise her to behave.
He promised he'd try to at least not unalive his coworkers, reluctantly...however they now just made sure to keep a safe distance at all times anyway.
This would later prove very convenient because specific areas were strictly forbidden for unauthorized personnel.
Precisely what Allice needed, and she would abuse this to sneak around to get a better idea on one of them, "Area 5B," for she knew her late husband worked near it.
Gu...Steve would be a lookout while pretending to mop the floor, and as expected, no one dared to bother.
She was surprised to learn that there was no security, cameras, guards, or other means to prevent someone from approaching, just a vast reinforced steel door.
Also, the restricted areas were marked with black and yellow lines on the floor.
With nothing more to discover, they went back unnoticed, or so they thought...
Some days later, Allice got asked to do overtime from higher up, or specific deadlines would not be made.
This was common in this line of work, and she could always use a little extra.
Oddly enough, she would be the only one that night beside a few janitors who had to clean up the mess from busy work days.
This was her chance and perhaps the only opportunity to find out what was behind that door!
Plus, she felt confident enough with G...STEVEN by her side; however, she strongly needed to urge him to be as SUBTLE as possible!
Steven then replied, "Sure, lass! Absolutely no problem!" She wasn't convinced...
That night, when all the regular staff had left, she would make her move and bring the forklift in to pry that door open!
The heavy steel door slides open vertically, so the idea was to jam the fork under to lift it; that was the plan.
Steven would join later, pretending to clean the hallway towards Allice to back her up.
No matter what happens, even if it would be the last thing she ever did, she would get her answers!
The moment was here! she was finally alone, and her heart was racing!
She calmly started the forklift and began making her way to Area 5B.
It was almost too quiet; distant, muffled voices from janitors could be heard from the other side of the compound as 5B was reached.
"Here we go then," she encouraged herself and positioned the machine, so its forks scraped the floor before making contact with the metal.
It seemed to work! The fork found just enough slack to crawl under, "Yes!" The next step was to hit that lever just right to raise it carefully in a controlled manner.
Bummer! it wouldn't budge an inch, and the machine was dangerously at the limit of its capabilities.
Clueless of what her next move would be in case of failure, she would give it all it had but then...BOOOOM! The machine gave out in a thick black curtain of smoke.
Shocked and confused, she got out coughing,.. cussing...."Stupid machine!" She kicked it repeatedly, followed by hitting it with her fists till they bled over and over as if that would somehow bring it back to life.
Defeated, she lowered herself to the ground against a wall, crying in desperation; she would never find her answers now and wanted to die already...but then...that voice...but.. comforting this time...
"Giving up already, lass? What would Abby think of ye..."-----"Ste...no...what?!"
There he stood! as the proud barbarian he was, is, and always will be, fully geared in his original state!
He had retrieved all of it after Allice took a headstart to work.
Before Allice had the chance to find the words..."Step aside, maiden." She needed not be told twice and made way.
Drawing his great axe as he was steadily approaching the steel barrier gave her flashbacks of when she first laid eyes on the giant, and all she could do was stand back in awe as he grabbed the forklift and tossed it out of the way like it was nothing!
Allice backed away further from this violent display while noticing the bleu shine emitted by his mighty weapon as he took an intimidating stance towards the impregnable wall.
No, it wasn't an upward or downward strike, nor did he attempt a side swipe! The way he planted it to the steel surface like a battering ram caused the metal to instantly deform in the opposite direction as if punched through a sheet of paper with SUCH FORCE;
The entire compound shook at its base.
A shockwave could be seen, heard, and felt, and if Allice didn't react fast enough to his last-second gesture to cover her ears, the drums would have disintegrated.
The dustcloud slowly descended, the glowing red-hot edges of what once stood firm now encircled the contours of a mighty warrior looking back to her over his shoulder and with his still faintly luminous two-hander casually resting on his back, he said...
"Subtle enough for ye? BWAHAHAHAHAHAAA!"
A dust-covered, shaking figure resembling Allice emerged and nodded quietly... took a moment to catch her breath and said:
"Do you think that maybe...possibly... you could have done that.....ANNY LOUDER, DAMNIT!!!"
"Eehhhhhhhmmm......Oi! woman! You are hard to please, ye know that?!
"F*ck! well...if no one had noticed our presence before, they have now...and what happened to the other janitors? Don't tell me you..."
"At ease, lass! I refrained from killing them, however...they are feeling it tomorrow...."
"good...*sighs in relief* good...gooooood..."
Minutes went by as mostly Allice was anxiously waiting for a possible response to the unholy noise produced by the breach.
Not Gunnar, though, no, he was impatiently waiting for a response, so he would have something to ki....*soul-piercing death-stare by Allice*...SUBTLY NEUTRALIZE, the opponent, of course! *Grins innocently*.
A good fifteen minutes later...nothing happened, so the two decided to descend into the uncovered dark tunnel.
As they made their way through the advanced-looking hexagon-shaped metal tunnel, light fixtures would light up and fade again once they passed, which gave them the un-earthed feeling that they were being watched.
They reached the end of the tunnel but saw nothing but a dark black hole; they halted under the last fixture, peering into the void.
It seemed to be a larger open space, but the absence of light made it impossible to know for sure.
Heavy consecutive switching noises ended the silence, and the two got blinded by a wall of bright light.
After their eyes adjusted to the light, they found themselves in a massive metal sphere.
In the center stood a peculiar object containing a couple of strange intertwining rotating spirals which seemed to hover in mid-air about a foot off the ground.
Gunnars eyes widened in surprised confusion, and he got flashbacks to the almost identical, bright flickering bubbles that brought him to this world!
He wanted to tell Allice, but before he could...her scream overruled him. "ABBY!!!" she froze for a second.
He quickly directed his gaze to where she was looking and found the little one restrained against the wall, unconscious.
A sinister-looking, conical-shaped, red-colored object had been aimed in her direction; it didn't look good!
Allice snapped out of it and instinctively sped towards her child, but a ray of light stopped her dead in her tracks, stunning her.
All she could do was move her head slightly and shout as she panicked, hanging helplessly in the air.
"What the hell! Abby! ABBY! Wake up! WAKE UP! please! ABBY!!!!!"
Gunnar felt how his blood began to boil and was about to rush in but got distracted by a dark male voice and....clapping?
"clap...clap...clap...clap...well...seems like our long-awaited guests have finally arrived, dear Lissandra," Alex said with a grin.
"LISSANDRA, YOU BITCH! I should have known this was all your doing!" Gunnar shouted.
"It sure seems that way, dear Alex" Lissandra smirked.
"Alex!? WHAT!? ALEX!!!!! IMPOSSIBLE!! THEY SAID YOU DIED THREE YEARS AGO IN THAT TERRIBLE ACCIDENT!!" Allice cried out in despair.
Learning that her late husband was still alive and well, combined with seeing her daughter like this and her inability to do something about it, was too much and she passed out.
"Oh my...what a delightful little reunion we have today wouldn't you agree, my Queen" Alex bowed down to Lissandra.
"Indeed, my loyal servant! You have done well; your Queen is pleased! Lissandra said with an evil smile.
Runeterra, Freljord, three years earlier.
Lissandra finally did it; the portal was finished!
She used her elemental magic to turn enough True ice into the dark and corrupted substance she needed to complete her project!
A magic portal capable of opening the door to other dimensions! Why conquer one world when you can conquer many?!
There was one complication, though...it could only be activated by a pure Iceborn, and she was not, for she was corrupted.
So the portal was useless unless...she could find a pure Iceborn to do her bidding.
So she met Trundle, an outcast troll who wandered into her domain searching for a powerful weapon to become the Troll king.
She offered him a mighty Ice club called Boneshiver, in exchange for his loyalty, he gladly accepted.
Now that she had found the key to her project, nothing would stand in her way, or would there be something.....
The portal activation backfired, absorbing most of its direct surroundings, including Lissandra, because her champion may have been a true Iceborn, but the weapon was still corrupted.
But things had been irreversibly set in motion, and a pure Iceborn had to be found, or Runeterra would be no more.
At the last possible moment, Lissandra used her abilities to trace the nearest source to ensure that there would be a world left to conquer.
That source was me, Gunnar the red entangled in an epic fight with a mighty beast.
Earth as we know it, three years earlier.
And so it happened that Lissandra found herself in this strange new world with no way back, for the portal had been destroyed.
The place she landed was littered with the debris of what was left of the portal and everything else it took with it, like bloody pieces of troll, for example...
Lucky for her, her powers worked here, but the fragments of dark Ice began to melt and deteriorate, for this world rejected it.
Lissandra Knew she would never be able to return to her homeworld if she didn't figure something out fast.
So she resorted to what she knew she was capable of, "elemental magic," And the only available material around here she could work with was this metallic kind of stuff.
It would have to do, so she infused what was left of her treasured Dark Ice with the abundantly available shiny metallic materials she could find all around.
Making it into an alloy that possessed the same properties but wouldn't deteriorate in this world, she was met with great success.
Lissandra was so preoccupied that she overlooked the mortally wounded body of Alex, which she accidentally stumbled upon.
Poor Alex just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time while doing overtime; he belonged to her now.
She used her magic to repair the damage to his fragile human body, and when he woke up, he would be turned into her minion to do her bidding.
The massive building she landed in provided more than enough opportunity to cover up her dark secrets and It didn't take much effort before she controlled almost everyone who worked there, almost...
There were a few strong-minded individuals she couldn't get a grip on, but that was of no concern to her; however, there was one individual she knew she would somehow have to manipulate into bringing her what she needed without controlling her.
Over the next three years, she would recreate the portal using her newly obtained minions, but the biggest problem remained, finding a true Iceborn.
Wich was presented as a certain barbarian who happened to get pulled in in at the last moment.
Earth as we know it, present time.
"I've heard enough! I'll end you here and now!" Gunnar roared in a threatening manner.
"I wouldn't do that if you want little Abby to live or your foolish shieldmaiden Allice who I used to the full extent to get you here."
"Used..her...to get to me?! Are there no limits to your wickedness!?" Gunnar growled through his teeth in rising anger.
Lissandra made her demands very clear to Gunnar.
If he refused, Abby and Allice would die; if he started a fight, Abby and Allice would die; if he yielded, Lissandra would be able to return to his homeworld, and still, everyone would die...
"Huhuh, hmmhahaha, HOOhohoho! WHAAHAHAHAHA!!!!" Gunnar seemed to have lost it...
"What are you laughing about?!!! Do you think this is a joke?! DO AS I DEMAND, OR THEY DIE!!!" Lissandra wasn't playing...
"Oi! shut yer trap, ye rotten little wich-bitch! It looks like I'm your only ticket out of here, ain't I?! huhuhuh..." Gunnar drew his one-hander and positioned the razor-sharp edge to his throat. "No matter what decision I make, I lose, so you know what...guess I should consider this the warrior's death I deserve."
But right before he wanted to slash it through his neck...
"STOP!" Lissandra also realized very well Gunnar never played around once he had set his mind on something.
They've always been sworn enemies and had fought many battles in the past, and she would love nothing more than to see him choke on his own blood by his own hand, but that would mean she would never be able to return.
She would be stuck in this rotten dimension she grew to hate to its core!
"Just...wait!...what if...we worked out some kind of agreement?" Lissandra asked carefully; the threatening tone was no more.
"What kind of agreement?" Gunnar asked, still holding the dangerous side of his weapon to his windpipe.
Lissandra had to think fast, weighing different scenarios against one another.
She eventually settled for the only acceptable one..."I'll let your humans go unharmed and release the rest from my control if you and I return together so we can continue hating each other back on Runeterra."
"Really now? and how do I know you'll honor your end of the bargain?" Gunnar had a valid point; it was hard to trust the witch.
"You wish to return as well,l don't you? besides...who's holding the one thing to his person that could keep me here near your beloved females..."
She was right, he hated to admit it, but the evil skank had a point.
Killing himself would result in her taking it out on the galls and everyone else in this world.
He could not let that happen.
At least, going back with his mortal enemy would ensure the future of his newfound friends, the strong, worthy female he wanted to take as his shield maiden and her kin.
Abby...that naughty little runt! With her mighty stuffed relic! He'd miss her so much, but it couldn't be helped; he made up his mind.
"Alright,t ye gnarly piece of Elnük droppings! What do I do?!"
The cheeky insults had her fuming on the inside, but she decided it would be best to save it for later.
"A drop of your blood and your nearby presence combined with you focusing on a specific place in Runeterra should do the trick; I just have to stand near you."
"Are you going to leave me, my Queen?" Alex cried.
"Ohh, shut up already!" She put him to sleep.
Gunnar approached the portal, stood before it, and tried to remember his hometown Hvitbjorg as he hovered a finger over the edge of his axe.
Lissandra had also come closer but remained at a reasonable distance from the savage, for she knew his weapons forged from True ice could easily end here when given the opportunity.
Her effective fighting style was from a distance, while his would smother her instantly from close range.
However, he wasn't going to risk it, for she could still kill his friends if she wanted to though he would love nothing more than to yank his axe through her wretched skull.
"Release them now, and I'll do it" Gunnar looked Lissandra dead in the eye.
"Sure!...whatever...but you better not try anything funny!" She waved in the air...Allice got released from her immobilized state and gently lowered onto the floor while still unconscious.
Abby got released from her shackles, also to be landed without shock which woke her up, noticing what was going on...
Alex and all the others were r, released from the spell and remembered nothing regarding what had happened in the last three years.
"So there...I held my end of the bargain; how about you hold yours??"
Gunnar took one last look at his companions, at Allice, whom he could not say goodbye to, and Abby....wait! Abby was awake?!
"I'm sorry little one! Where I'm going, you can't follow, now be a good little runt and take care of your mother for me, will ye?
Gunnar slid his finger over his axe, drawing blood from himself, which immediately set off the portal which started spinning, creating spherical shockwaves around the two arch enemies.
Eventually engulfing them with the bright flickering spheres then.....nothing...
Hvitbjorg village, the Freljord, Runeterra. Present day.
Gunnar was up early and went out for some firewood.
On return, he started a fire to warm the place and make them breakfast.
Yes..."them"...the sound of little toddler feet on the wooden floor and the cheeky giggles got him looking over his shoulder.
"Well, good morning to you too, runt!"
The bright flickering spheres around him faded, and he slowly recovered his eyesight.
"Where am I? How did I get here?" he thought, but there was nothing familiar about the strange world around him.
Just moments ago, he was fighting a Mountain drake which threatened the people of the Ice children village up in the mountains.
And was about to deliver the final blow to it when he suddenly couldn't move his body and got engulfed in these bright spherical bubbles which blinded him and put him to sleep.
Gunnar didn't know how long he was out, but by the time he woke up, he was in an alien world...
Huge, high stone things surrounded him, and he didn't like it at all!
"By Odin! what is all this!" He murmured in utter confusion.
Disoriented as he was, trying to take everything in, human-like beings hastily passed him by on this solid, black-and-white striped surface uncomfortably close and seemingly unphased by his appearanc, it quickly started to get on his nerves.
"Get off the road, freak!"..." Yooo! it's been Halloween already, man!"..."Mommy, look! a caveman!"
Gunnar couldn't believe his ears, one would usually think twice before opening one's mouth to him like that, and if it weren't for the sudden panic behind him, he would have started swinging!
"NOOOOOOO!! ABBY, GET OFF THE ROAD!!!" A female-like figure in an apparent state of panic screamed at a tiny, white-haired humanoid in the middle of the hard flat surface.
Apparently, the dwarf had lost a precious animal-shaped item while crossing and had freed itself from its attendant to retrieve it.
"Must be a powerful relic that cannot be lost," He thought, but then he noticed the fast-approaching, strange, roaring creature in the corner of his eye and raised his brows in surprise when hearing its sudden high-pitched monstrous scream! "HOOOOONK!!"
Within seconds, Gunnar realized the dwarf was in mortal danger, about to be attacked and killed by the charging beast trying to slow down by making loud noises with its odd, black, round-shaped feet...
Gunnar was merely a few feet away and jumped in front of the dwarf, blocking the charging entity without hesitance, pulled his great axe from his back, and raised it high to prepare for a devastating counterattack.
"BEGONE DEMON!!" He shouted as he swung his axe down with deadly precision, hitting the semi-truck through the middle of the hood with such force that it stopped entirely and was dead in its tracks!
The sudden lack of forward momentum combined with the sheer mass of the semi caused it to fly up and over the two.
Tons of debris flew around as the semi went airborne, doing multiple somersaults before landing on its feet again, coming to a complete stop by crashing into a building.
It was absolute chaos as hundreds of people started screaming, panicking, and running, which confused Gunnar even more, for he thought he had demonstrated his might to slay the beast and was expecting nothing less than a cheerful crowd but........A gentile touch...a tiny hand grabbing onto his finger...
He looked down at the light-haired little person clamping onto one of his finger with her tiny hand and couldn't suppress a smile; she lived.
The mother rushed in, firmly grabbing the infant with one arm while grabbing Gunnars hand with the other, *Come! Quickly! Before the cops arrive!* The female urged him.
"What kind of creature is a cop?" Gunnar asked excitedly, hoping for a strong opponent to fight.
"Don't be stupid! Come with me! now!!" The female urged again, louder this time which pleasantly surprised Gunnar, for he has always been a sucker for strong women.
And these so-called "Cop" creatures must be powerful for her not to want to stick around.
"But I want to see the cops!" He told her with a disappointed look on his face.
"Are you an IDIOT?! Do you want to get yourself arrested?! come on already!!" Rendered speechless, he reluctantly tagged along, swinging his great axe over his shoulder, wondering if "being arrested" meant dying a glorious death in battle...
Gunnar sat on an extraordinary but comfy thing they call "coush" "Couch!" Abby corrected him as she giggled, sitting on his lap and playing with his goatee.
It made him somewhat uncomfortable, but he didn't have the slightest idea what to do or where to go from here, so he had to settle for his current situation.
He must have spent a good thirty minutes examining the magic wonder box this tribe calls "T.V, " which could show you the past as he watched a news feed about what happened earlier.
He felt relieved that a strong female dared to stand up to him, guide him, and even take him into her home! Something that's not commonly practiced in his tribe for respect and trust had to be earned!....wait! he did guard the little runt against getting eaten by what he later learned was a "truuk" "Truck!" The little runt corrected him again, forcing something like a faint smile on his face.
"So I earned her respect," Gunnar silently boasted to himself, "I might have found my new shieldmaiden" He could already picture their marriage in his mind.
"Hey! want some coffee and toast? I don't have much since I got...distracted... before getting the chance to buy groceries."
The "Strong woman," who goes by the name "Allice," walked in from the cooking area bearing gifts on a plank containing perfectly shaped bowls with tiny ears.
And those lightly seared, perfectly cut chunks of...bread? "That's bread?!"...
"Of course, it's bread! What else would it be?.... you're not from around here, are you? And what the heck happened back there with that truck? I still can't believe what I saw..."
Not quite the reaction he expected..."Oi! this is how your tribe shows gratitude for saving one's kin?" He felt seriously wronged...she noticed and softened her voice, realizing how anxious she was. "I'm sorry...I didn't mean to upset you...Thank you for keeping her safe."
She handed him a bowl with the ear facing him, but he failed to understand how to accept such a gift and rudely clamped on to the ear, which snapped right off, causing the hot fluid to spill all over his lap!
"BY ODIN! HOT! HOT, HOT!" Good thing Abby got off his lap to play with her dollhouse, for the startled Gunnar, jumped up and raged around the living room, breaking everything in his path until....*SLAP!*...He froze, placed a hand to his cheek, and gazed at the angered woman with dull eyes...
"What the hell, idiot! You broke half my house! What the literal fuck were you thinking! Who's going to pay for all this damage, huh?! I'm broke enough already, damn it!!"
And that is how the two met.
Gunnar felt guilty for the destruction he caused in the shieldmaidens hut and promised to make things right again but didn't know how.
Also, he did not carry any gold to pay for the damage; who carries gold when hunting dragons anyway?
Then there was also the issue of the recent events in the city center.
Apparently, all the humanoids here carry their own little magic boxes, capable of recording the past, and Gunnar learned what it meant to go...viral...
Amateur footage of his epic battle had spread all over the planet, but luckily, none showed a clear image of his face.
Gunnar could not be more proud of this, but Allice kept him in line, and he had grown on her big time!
As solid and mighty, he was a brute, so tender and weak he felt around Allice, his lovely shieldmaiden though, she would have none of it; she just wanted coverage for her stuff... at first.
Later, she would melt for the gentle giant who wasn't Subtle about anything.
After many heated debates, they finally agreed it would be best to change his appearance to keep him out of trouble.
The goatee had to go; his ginger hair would be dyed, his armor had to be replaced by regular clothes, and his weapons hidden carefully.
Gunnar experienced an emotion he didn't know existed...sadness...
But he agreed, and voila! He was no longer Gunnar the red, but Steve the janitor...for he agreed to earn his way out of debt by accepting a job where Allice worked, a vast storage facility at the city's edge.
Allice worked there as a forklift driver and had to make long hours to even get by each month; her late husband, who also worked there, had passed away three years ago under mysterious circumstances, and she was determined to get to the bottom of it.
All that was lacking was any possible clue whatsoever, but she never stopped digging around, carefully not to piss off the wrong people.
First day on the job and
He promised he'd try to at least not unalive his coworkers, reluctantly...however they now just made sure to keep a safe distance at all times anyway.
This would later prove very convenient because specific areas were strictly forbidden for unauthorized personnel.
Precisely what Allice needed, and she would abuse this to sneak around to get a better idea on one of them, "Area 5B," for she knew her late husband worked near it.
Gu...Steve would be a lookout while pretending to mop the floor, and as expected, no one dared to bother.
She was surprised to learn that there was no security, cameras, guards, or other means to prevent someone from approaching, just a vast reinforced steel door.
Also, the restricted areas were marked with black and yellow lines on the floor.
With nothing more to discover, they went back unnoticed, or so they thought...
Some days later, Allice got asked to do overtime from higher up, or specific deadlines would not be made.
This was common in this line of work, and she could always use a little extra.
Oddly enough, she would be the only one that night beside a few janitors who had to clean up the mess from busy work days.
This was her chance and perhaps the only opportunity to find out what was behind that door!
Plus, she felt confident enough with G...STEVEN by her side; however, she strongly needed to urge him to be as SUBTLE as possible!
Steven then replied, "Sure, lass! Absolutely no problem!" She wasn't convinced...
That night, when all the regular staff had left, she would make her move and bring the forklift in to pry that door open!
The heavy steel door slides open vertically, so the idea was to jam the fork under to lift it; that was the plan.
Steven would join later, pretending to clean the hallway towards Allice to back her up.
No matter what happens, even if it would be the last thing she ever did, she would get her answers!
The moment was here! she was finally alone, and her heart was racing!
She calmly started the forklift and began making her way to Area 5B.
It was almost too quiet; distant, muffled voices from janitors could be heard from the other side of the compound as 5B was reached.
"Here we go then," she encouraged herself and positioned the machine, so its forks scraped the floor before making contact with the metal.
It seemed to work! The fork found just enough slack to crawl under, "Yes!" The next step was to hit that lever just right to raise it carefully in a controlled manner.
Bummer! it wouldn't budge an inch, and the machine was dangerously at the limit of its capabilities.
Clueless of what her next move would be in case of failure, she would give it all it had but then...BOOOOM! The machine gave out in a thick black curtain of smoke.
Shocked and confused, she got out coughing,.. cussing...."Stupid machine!" She kicked it repeatedly, followed by hitting it with her fists till they bled over and over as if that would somehow bring it back to life.
Defeated, she lowered herself to the ground against a wall, crying in desperation; she would never find her answers now and wanted to die already...but then...that voice...but.. comforting this time...
"Giving up already, lass? What would Abby think of ye..."-----"Ste...no...what?!"
There he stood! as the proud barbarian he was, is, and always will be, fully geared in his original state!
He had retrieved all of it after Allice took a headstart to work.
Before Allice had the chance to find the words..."Step aside, maiden." She needed not be told twice and made way.
Drawing his great axe as he was steadily approaching the steel barrier gave her flashbacks of when she first laid eyes on the giant, and all she could do was stand back in awe as he grabbed the forklift and tossed it out of the way like it was nothing!
Allice backed away further from this violent display while noticing the bleu shine emitted by his mighty weapon as he took an intimidating stance towards the impregnable wall.
No, it wasn't an upward or downward strike, nor did he attempt a side swipe! The way he planted it to the steel surface like a battering ram caused the metal to instantly deform in the opposite direction as if punched through a sheet of paper with SUCH FORCE;
The entire compound shook at its base.
A shockwave could be seen, heard, and felt, and if Allice didn't react fast enough to his last-second gesture to cover her ears, the drums would have disintegrated.
The dustcloud slowly descended, the glowing red-hot edges of what once stood firm now encircled the contours of a mighty warrior looking back to her over his shoulder and with his still faintly luminous two-hander casually resting on his back, he said...
"Subtle enough for ye? BWAHAHAHAHAHAAA!"
A dust-covered, shaking figure resembling Allice emerged and nodded quietly... took a moment to catch her breath and said:
"Do you think that maybe...possibly... you could have done that.....ANNY LOUDER, DAMNIT!!!"
"Eehhhhhhhmmm......Oi! woman! You are hard to please, ye know that?!
"F*ck! well...if no one had noticed our presence before, they have now...and what happened to the other janitors? Don't tell me you..."
"At ease, lass! I refrained from killing them, however...they are feeling it tomorrow...."
"good...*sighs in relief* good...gooooood..."
Minutes went by as mostly Allice was anxiously waiting for a possible response to the unholy noise produced by the breach.
Not Gunnar, though, no, he was impatiently waiting for a response, so he would have something to ki....*soul-piercing death-stare by Allice*...SUBTLY NEUTRALIZE, the opponent, of course! *Grins innocently*.
A good fifteen minutes later...nothing happened, so the two decided to descend into the uncovered dark tunnel.
As they made their way through the advanced-looking hexagon-shaped metal tunnel, light fixtures would light up and fade again once they passed, which gave them the un-earthed feeling that they were being watched.
They reached the end of the tunnel but saw nothing but a dark black hole; they halted under the last fixture, peering into the void.
It seemed to be a larger open space, but the absence of light made it impossible to know for sure.
Heavy consecutive switching noises ended the silence, and the two got blinded by a wall of bright light.
After their eyes adjusted to the light, they found themselves in a massive metal sphere.
In the center stood a peculiar object containing a couple of strange intertwining rotating spirals which seemed to hover in mid-air about a foot off the ground.
Gunnars eyes widened in surprised confusion, and he got flashbacks to the almost identical, bright flickering bubbles that brought him to this world!
He wanted to tell Allice, but before he could...her scream overruled him. "ABBY!!!" she froze for a second.
He quickly directed his gaze to where she was looking and found the little one restrained against the wall, unconscious.
A sinister-looking, conical-shaped, red-colored object had been aimed in her direction; it didn't look good!
Allice snapped out of it and instinctively sped towards her child, but a ray of light stopped her dead in her tracks, stunning her.
All she could do was move her head slightly and shout as she panicked, hanging helplessly in the air.
"What the hell! Abby! ABBY! Wake up! WAKE UP! please! ABBY!!!!!"
Gunnar felt how his blood began to boil and was about to rush in but got distracted by a dark male voice and....clapping?
"clap...clap...clap...clap...well...seems like our long-awaited guests have finally arrived, dear Lissandra," Alex said with a grin.
"LISSANDRA, YOU BITCH! I should have known this was all your doing!" Gunnar shouted.
"It sure seems that way, dear Alex" Lissandra smirked.
"Alex!? WHAT!? ALEX!!!!! IMPOSSIBLE!! THEY SAID YOU DIED THREE YEARS AGO IN THAT TERRIBLE ACCIDENT!!" Allice cried out in despair.
Learning that her late husband was still alive and well, combined with seeing her daughter like this and her inability to do something about it, was too much and she passed out.
"Oh my...what a delightful little reunion we have today wouldn't you agree, my Queen" Alex bowed down to Lissandra.
"Indeed, my loyal servant! You have done well; your Queen is pleased! Lissandra said with an evil smile.
Runeterra, Freljord, three years earlier.
Lissandra finally did it; the portal was finished!
She used her elemental magic to turn enough True ice into the dark and corrupted substance she needed to complete her project!
A magic portal capable of opening the door to other dimensions! Why conquer one world when you can conquer many?!
There was one complication, though...it could only be activated by a pure Iceborn, and she was not, for she was corrupted.
So the portal was useless unless...she could find a pure Iceborn to do her bidding.
So she met Trundle, an outcast troll who wandered into her domain searching for a powerful weapon to become the Troll king.
She offered him a mighty Ice club called Boneshiver, in exchange for his loyalty, he gladly accepted.
Now that she had found the key to her project, nothing would stand in her way, or would there be something.....
The portal activation backfired, absorbing most of its direct surroundings, including Lissandra, because her champion may have been a true Iceborn, but the weapon was still corrupted.
But things had been irreversibly set in motion, and a pure Iceborn had to be found, or Runeterra would be no more.
At the last possible moment, Lissandra used her abilities to trace the nearest source to ensure that there would be a world left to conquer.
That source was me, Gunnar the red entangled in an epic fight with a mighty beast.
Earth as we know it, three years earlier.
And so it happened that Lissandra found herself in this strange new world with no way back, for the portal had been destroyed.
The place she landed was littered with the debris of what was left of the portal and everything else it took with it, like bloody pieces of troll, for example...
Lucky for her, her powers worked here, but the fragments of dark Ice began to melt and deteriorate, for this world rejected it.
Lissandra Knew she would never be able to return to her homeworld if she didn't figure something out fast.
So she resorted to what she knew she was capable of, "elemental magic," And the only available material around here she could work with was this metallic kind of stuff.
It would have to do, so she infused what was left of her treasured Dark Ice with the abundantly available shiny metallic materials she could find all around.
Making it into an alloy that possessed the same properties but wouldn't deteriorate in this world, she was met with great success.
Lissandra was so preoccupied that she overlooked the mortally wounded body of Alex, which she accidentally stumbled upon.
Poor Alex just happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time while doing overtime; he belonged to her now.
She used her magic to repair the damage to his fragile human body, and when he woke up, he would be turned into her minion to do her bidding.
The massive building she landed in provided more than enough opportunity to cover up her dark secrets and It didn't take much effort before she controlled almost everyone who worked there, almost...
There were a few strong-minded individuals she couldn't get a grip on, but that was of no concern to her; however, there was one individual she knew she would somehow have to manipulate into bringing her what she needed without controlling her.
Over the next three years, she would recreate the portal using her newly obtained minions, but the biggest problem remained, finding a true Iceborn.
Wich was presented as a certain barbarian who happened to get pulled in in at the last moment.
Earth as we know it, present time.
"I've heard enough! I'll end you here and now!" Gunnar roared in a threatening manner.
"I wouldn't do that if you want little Abby to live or your foolish shieldmaiden Allice who I used to the full extent to get you here."
"Used..her...to get to me?! Are there no limits to your wickedness!?" Gunnar growled through his teeth in rising anger.
Lissandra made her demands very clear to Gunnar.
If he refused, Abby and Allice would die; if he started a fight, Abby and Allice would die; if he yielded, Lissandra would be able to return to his homeworld, and still, everyone would die...
"Huhuh, hmmhahaha, HOOhohoho! WHAAHAHAHAHA!!!!" Gunnar seemed to have lost it...
"What are you laughing about?!!! Do you think this is a joke?! DO AS I DEMAND, OR THEY DIE!!!" Lissandra wasn't playing...
"Oi! shut yer trap, ye rotten little wich-bitch! It looks like I'm your only ticket out of here, ain't I?! huhuhuh..." Gunnar drew his one-hander and positioned the razor-sharp edge to his throat. "No matter what decision I make, I lose, so you know what...guess I should consider this the warrior's death I deserve."
But right before he wanted to slash it through his neck...
"STOP!" Lissandra also realized very well Gunnar never played around once he had set his mind on something.
They've always been sworn enemies and had fought many battles in the past, and she would love nothing more than to see him choke on his own blood by his own hand, but that would mean she would never be able to return.
She would be stuck in this rotten dimension she grew to hate to its core!
"Just...wait!...what if...we worked out some kind of agreement?" Lissandra asked carefully; the threatening tone was no more.
"What kind of agreement?" Gunnar asked, still holding the dangerous side of his weapon to his windpipe.
Lissandra had to think fast, weighing different scenarios against one another.
She eventually settled for the only acceptable one..."I'll let your humans go unharmed and release the rest from my control if you and I return together so we can continue hating each other back on Runeterra."
"Really now? and how do I know you'll honor your end of the bargain?" Gunnar had a valid point; it was hard to trust the witch.
"You wish to return as well,l don't you? besides...who's holding the one thing to his person that could keep me here near your beloved females..."
She was right, he hated to admit it, but the evil skank had a point.
Killing himself would result in her taking it out on the galls and everyone else in this world.
He could not let that happen.
At least, going back with his mortal enemy would ensure the future of his newfound friends, the strong, worthy female he wanted to take as his shield maiden and her kin.
Abby...that naughty little runt! With her mighty stuffed relic! He'd miss her so much, but it couldn't be helped; he made up his mind.
"Alright,t ye gnarly piece of Elnük droppings! What do I do?!"
The cheeky insults had her fuming on the inside, but she decided it would be best to save it for later.
"A drop of your blood and your nearby presence combined with you focusing on a specific place in Runeterra should do the trick; I just have to stand near you."
"Are you going to leave me, my Queen?" Alex cried.
"Ohh, shut up already!" She put him to sleep.
Gunnar approached the portal, stood before it, and tried to remember his hometown Hvitbjorg as he hovered a finger over the edge of his axe.
Lissandra had also come closer but remained at a reasonable distance from the savage, for she knew his weapons forged from True ice could easily end here when given the opportunity.
Her effective fighting style was from a distance, while his would smother her instantly from close range.
However, he wasn't going to risk it, for she could still kill his friends if she wanted to though he would love nothing more than to yank his axe through her wretched skull.
"Release them now, and I'll do it" Gunnar looked Lissandra dead in the eye.
"Sure!...whatever...but you better not try anything funny!" She waved in the air...Allice got released from her immobilized state and gently lowered onto the floor while still unconscious.
Abby got released from her shackles, also to be landed without shock which woke her up, noticing what was going on...
Alex and all the others were r, released from the spell and remembered nothing regarding what had happened in the last three years.
"So there...I held my end of the bargain; how about you hold yours??"
Gunnar took one last look at his companions, at Allice, whom he could not say goodbye to, and Abby....wait! Abby was awake?!
"I'm sorry little one! Where I'm going, you can't follow, now be a good little runt and take care of your mother for me, will ye?
Gunnar slid his finger over his axe, drawing blood from himself, which immediately set off the portal which started spinning, creating spherical shockwaves around the two arch enemies.
Eventually engulfing them with the bright flickering spheres then.....nothing...
Hvitbjorg village, the Freljord, Runeterra. Present day.
Gunnar was up early and went out for some firewood.
On return, he started a fire to warm the place and make them breakfast.
Yes..."them"...the sound of little toddler feet on the wooden floor and the cheeky giggles got him looking over his shoulder.
"Well, good morning to you too, runt!"
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