Writing Challenge- June, 2016

[JamesMartin]

Well, our first challenge appears to have been a success. Thank you to all participants and voters. But that's not why you're here. So, this months challenge:

Whereas last month was all about characters, this time, it's all about story. And in keeping with the start of summer, a themed challenge is in order.


This month, your task is: Tell us the story of a summer vacation gone wrong.

Those are the only parameters. Literally every other thing in the story is yours to decide, so long as it conforms with the rules as they now stand. You can refresh yourself on them here.

Just a few quick notes:

1. There is no minimum length. If you can tell a full story in a ten sentence poem, go forth.

2. There is also no maximum length, though we do ask you try to keep it within a reasonable length, for the sake of voters who have to read it all

3. This is a chance to test yourself and get a little out of your comfort zone. Don't let fear of judgement or of not winning sway you. We know the lot of you can write—why not show off a little?

Best of luck, we look forward to seeing what you can come up with.

Regards,

Your Inner Sanctum Staff

 

[Kia Wolfblood]

Spoiler: Kia's Submission.

This vacation was Supposed to be one to get away form every one and For Mya Rogers to get her head together. It started of great, going to the beach every day working on that perfect kissed by the sun tan. Enjoying no one asking her about her father or even knowing she was alive. For once in her life she felt normal just plain a not under pressure to be perfect because she was Captain America's daughter. It was getting late in the evening the sun was casting the last of it's golden rays as she walked from the beach.

Standing five feet seven inches, with long copper hair that waved just slightly. She had dark blue eyes that were seeming to sparkle in the sun's fading light. She had on a pair of short shorts over her bikini bottoms her black and purple bikini top was all that covered her upper half. She was going to the rental car when she felt like she was being watched. Knowing her father had enemies all around she halted in her steps. That's when it all went black.

When she came to she put her hand to the back of her head "Owe what happened to me" She looked around a bit of panic as it was all dark in the room. "Where am I?" She asked trying to get up realizing at that her ankle was tied down with a chain. She closed her eyes breathing deeply Great dad or the avengers got me taken again. That's when the door opened and a light came one. "Good you're awake. I hope I didn't hurt you too bad" Came the deep voice of a male.

Mya looked at him as if he had lost his mind. He was tall around six feet and very broad. Dark hair and eyes. He seemed genially concerned about her. "Who are you? Who do you work for an what ever my dad or the avengers have done I have nothing to do with it."

"You don't understand I'm doing what I have to do. Please believe me I don't want to hurt you I am Trevan. This won't be long I promise" He told her approaching her slowly

"Trevan you have no Idea what kind of hell you are bringing on yourself. I'm not scared for you at all heck I got a nice comfy bed to sleep in I don't have to do anything for myself actually pretty nice compares to the last time I was taken"

 

[JamesMartin]

Spoiler: James's Submission

"You look like a fish out of water right now"

The line echoed in Sara's head through the pulsating beat of the club music. American accent, someone from home. Truth be told she was shocked she could hear anything at all. The pulsing of the nearest bass had the whole room shaking in a fairly uncomfortable way. She had to keep fidgeting, trying to find a position that wasn't somewhere between sitting on a running washing machine and sitting on a giant vibrator. It wouldn't have been so bad. Except that the music was terrible to boot.

She looked around, brushing dark curls to get a look at the man who had spoken. He was prettier than most of the ones who had been feeding her cheesy lines all night. She seemed to attract them. She was half tempted to check if some joker had posted an "Annoy me" sign on her back. She raised a painted eyebrows at the speaker "That it? As far as lines go... that seems like the first half of something pretty extraordinary in its badness" She smirked slightly. This one she wouldn't mind feeding a few lines at her. Hell. With this one, she might even let it go further. Though there was the slight chance that latter thought was just the vibrating chair talking.

He smiled "Nope. I just thought you looked out of your element. I mean... I COULD complete the line. Maybe: You look like a fish out of water; Dripping wet and perfect for eating. Or... actually, that's pretty much the best I got. Or the worst, depending on which side of the line you fall on. But back to the original point... you don't much seem to be enjoying yourself. Especially the music"

She blushed; thank god it was too dark and too overheated in there for him to notice. She had skin like painted porcelain... a blush on her in proper light would wind up looking like something that someone needed medical attention for. She nodded "The music isn't the worst thing in the world. Or at least, I can think of worse things; Sandals with socks... high heels... pantyhose... genocide. But still... it's pretty bad. This fish isn't so much out of the water as into the skillet. Still... here I am. First time in London, friends have bugged me to visit for years... and they not only take me to a club like any in the US of A... but they then let themselves get picked up. And so here I am, just waiting for them to get their clothes back on and remember the stick in the mud they left at the shitty club. "

He chuckled, sliding into the seat next to her like a slithering cobra. She finally got a good look at him. Average height, lithe build, with brown hair and a distinct need of a razor on an otherwise well formed face. A couple years older at least, maybe even mid twenties. With the stubble, he had one of those annoyingly ambiguous faces. But she was starting college officially in September after a gap year. Technically this trip was her already starting. A summer abroad, studying while she vacationed. English history, learned in England would be doubly fascinating. Once she met her professor and classmates. She might have missed their first session. Or two. But that was quite beside the point. She was at least old enough not to discriminate. He was wearing a dress shirt and pants, the plain black and white a stark contrast to her own dress. With purple covered in embroidered floral patterns of red, there were probably peacocks out there who would call it a little over the top. Its halter top secured to a choker on her throat kept modesty at the front, but it left everything until well below her shoulder blades bare and though it reached her knees, it was skin tight all the way up, a slit on one side reaching her mid thigh in order to make complex functions like walking possible. Her shoes were three inch heels, with a colour that had resulted in her clicking them together and saying " there's no place like home" more than once since she had put them on.

"Sounds tragic. I myself have likewise been abandoned by my companions. Turns out that as nice as my legs are... they're not nice enough to hold attention." He chuckled. "Yours though... yours are the type that I'm surprised anyone could abandon. I suppose though that if we are destined to await others... we could do so on the dance floor."

"We could." She nodded "Except for the fact that I've got two left feet and both of them in heels"

"Perfect." He said, taking her arm and pulling her with him. "I've got two right feet. We can balance out. Or at least try to trip in a rhythm." He pulled her in and was leading before she knew what to say to that. The dance was surprisingly pleasant. He had her in firm control, whirling like a pair of dervishes. She was dangerously close to enjoying herself, in spite of the heat and the powerful smell in the room. Cologne, perfume, old sweat, all layered thickly. All the stink of sex with none of the fun. Well, maybe not none. With the way he moved her, she might well have preferred sitting on the giant vibrator. At least she wasn't drunk enough for the chair to talk her into anything. But the longer she danced, the less she cared. She was young, she was on vacation and it would hardly be a first for her. If fumbled teenage trysts in the back of her parent's minivan counted. Though she wasn't exactly the love em and leave em type either, she was determined to enjoy herself, come what may. So when he went in for the kiss, her only reply was a feather light kiss back, teasing him into further aggression. He suddenly had an arm around her waist, an insistence in his step and she was giggling when his stubble tickled her neck, half falling with him into a cab as he gave an address. Not a hotel and fairly near the university. He must be a resident, not a tourist. Ah well. It was a big school and someone who lived here was unlikely to be student in a summer abroad class. Aside from the fact he looked old enough to be in his final year. His age really was hard to place, especially when the only time his face left her neck was to let her do up her seatbelt. Her skirts had gotten a little knotted, pushing her leg out of the slit such that the fabric was only covering her inner thigh and her hip. Not that she minded. He'd be seeing a lot more of it before too long. When they arrived, he helped her from the cab, while she let him lead her inside. This was a nice apartment for a student, especially in London. Must be family money.

It all preceded from there as one might have expected. A staggered backwards walk for her into the bedroom, tasting tongue while plotting the deaths of all the girls who had pressured her to wear heels that night, fumbling over the buttons of his shirt before she found herself tripping over a book. She caught a quick glance of the cover. Churchill's History of the English Speaking Peoples, one of her coursebooks. She couldn't dwell on that though, as after her trip, she found herself caught between a very soft mattress and a wall of very hard muscles. More kissing, the taste of whatever had been on tap back at the bar in his hot breath. Fondling as she felt the clasp holding her dress to her necklace undone. No turning back now. She was glad for the backless dress. It meant she had less time wasted while he fumbled for a nonexistent bra strap before she felt his hands on bare, sensitive skin. More kissing, less dress, a deep blush at the realization she had grabbed novelty panties covered in teddy bears while dressing herself and from there, it was all out of her hands. Fingers, lips, tongue and more. So much more. She was in bliss.

---------------------------------------------------------------------

Sara awoke to the feeling of cold air on naked, pimpled flesh. He had apparently run the air conditioner on overdrive and she had fallen asleep—very naked—on top of the blankets. She hurried to pull herself against the nearest—equally naked—heat source, all while she tried to piece together her evening over the sound of a percussion band playing in her head. A lot to drink apparently. Soreness. Must have involved a very particular type of fun. She cleared her throat and with a sudden taste amidst the dryness, there was further conformation. A very fun night it seemed. She was content to lie back, cuddle, relax, soothe her feel good aches and hope the hangover didn't last.

Then she saw the clock.

It was already 9:00. And she had class by noon.

No time for politeness or ceremony. She practically leapt from the bed, her head hammering in protest to the heretical notion of movement. Her dress was easily found, though less easily donned and her shoes were still where she could find them. Finding her underwear was quickly abandoned as a lost cause, in spite of some unpleasant stickiness on her inner thigh she just chose not to think about during her cab ride home. She had to shower and change and had never even seriously considered a goodbye. She had had fun, but enough was enough. In fact, she could only recall his last name. Williams.

Somehow, by the grace of God, she made it. Showered, changed into a denim skirt and red blouse, this time opting for sandals. Real, dependable footwear, not those instruments of the devil from the night before. She even managed to rebraid her hair and get her makeup changed to something more casual. And for her own sanity, she chose panties free of teddy bears.

She stepped into the classroom. Two months of hands on English history training. A perfect vacation for a nerd like her. Apparently this class would be discussing their first guided excursion, to the Tower of London. She was eager for learning and ready to smack the first kid who asked about ghosts.

She sat herself down and watched other students percolate in, coming individually, in pairs or as groups. Ten minutes passed. Then fifteen. Still no sign of the professor. He was apparently something of a progeny, young and talented. A man like that—probably busy.

But the next one to enter the room wasn't her professor. It was her midnight tryst, looking extravagant in a suit. She squirmed, trying and failing to discover invisibility. Instead, she simply blushed pure crimson, probably looking like she was bleeding from her face. She raised a tentative hand when his eyes met hers and she started to say "Fancy seeing you here.". The words never came though, nothing did but a squeak. He spoke first. But not to her.

"Good morning class. Apologies for my tardiness. I was... occupied, quite late last night. For those just joining us, I'm Professor Williams and the group of us will be spending a lot of time together over these next few months. We should start with introductions for the new people. Why don't you start... Sara, wasn't it?"

Fuck.

 

[Thana Silver Vampire Wolf]

Spoiler: Thana's Submission

LJ was walking her dog since it was a nice warm/cool summer day. She never expected her summer to go from good to total hell in one day. She walked past her friends house to notice police and ambulances in the driveway.

"Excuse me but what happened here?" She asked one of the police men.

"The granddaughter and grandson was murdered last night. The grandparents don't know by who. We think it's the same killer that's been killing teens and young adults for a few weeks now." The police man said. She nodded and tired to see her friends grandparents.

"Are the grandparents ok? They didn't get hurt did they? May I see them please? I am a friend of their grandson." She said worried about her friends family but also wanted to investigate. The police man allowed her through as well as lead her to them.

"Hey. I hope they catch the person that did this." She said to her friends grandparents. 'If they don't I will. No one has the right to kill my best friend!' she thought.

"We do too." They said. After that she went home. Unaware that she was being watched by something or someone. When she got home she noticed that her parents and siblings left for a while, more like a few days.

"Seems we get the house to ourselves." She said to her dog, Shadow. She started to make something for dinner since it was getting dark out. She finished cooking her meal then started to eat. While eating she felt like she was being watched. She looked around knowing full well it wasn't Shadow for he was eating some of his dog food.

She tired to ignore it even after she finished eating and started to clean up. She did the dishes before going to her room and changing into night clothes. She then returned downstairs to watch Netflix. While watching she was unaware that someone was coming up behind her with a knife. Shadow started to bark which startled the person and caused LJ to look behind her and nearly scream.

When the male killer noticed he lunges for her, hoping to hit a main artery or organ. She moved, dodging his attack, and then started to run to the kitchen, where her parents keep a loaded gun in case something like this happens. And since she was 18 years old she knew she wouldn't be in trouble for using it. And she was glad her father taught her how to use it. But before she could get it the male throw his knife at her, getting her leg while the blade buried itself in the bone.

She screamed in pure pain, hoping someone would hear her scream. For what seemed like hours, but we're really just minutes, the male slowly cut into her. He was only tormenting her for his sick enjoyment. She tried not she cry because of the pain because she didn't want to see him grin that sadisitc grin of his. Both of them then heard Shadow bark.

"Shut up you stupid mutt!" The male said and throw another knife at Shadow, badly wounding him.

"Shadow! No you ass!" LJ yelled in hatred. But the male only laughed at this. She glared nothing but hate in her eyes. Neither of them were aware that her neighbor called the cops. While LJ was being tormented she didn't care if she was in pain. She was worried about her dog.

Almost 5 minutes later both of them heard the sirens of the cop cars and many others. LJ grinned a slightly sadistic smirk.

"Looks like your in deep shit." She said her eyes still filled with hatred and some insanity from being tormented, which did slightly change her. The male growled and quickly fled, vowing he would be back to finish her off. She watched him run like a bat out of Hell. She then slowly crawled over to her dog. She slowly and carefully grabbed him trying to stop his wound from bleeding.

The door was broken open to reveal the same police officer she talked to earlier that day. He seemed to have paled at the sight before him.

"Get a stretcher in here!" He yelled then ran to LJ, who was carefully holding Shadow and trying to keep him from bleeding out. A half hour later LJ was admitted to the near by hospital for treatment. They were even kind enough to to get a vet up there for Shadow since she begged for them to help him as well, crying while doing so. When they finally got LJ to calm down and reassured her that Shadow will be fine. She only nodded and slowly feel asleep, unaware that they wouldn't be able to save Shadow.

When morning came she looked around for Shadow since they said he would be there when she woke up. But she couldn't find him. She started to panick which caused her heart rate to go nuts. Doctors came in trying to calm her.

"Where's Shadow? Where my dog?" She asked still panicked. The Doctors looked at one another a bit unsure of what to say.

"Listen the dog, Shadow, didn't make it. I'm sorry to say but he is dead." The doctor said. LJ started to cry.

"And you will have to stay here even after your family returns home. You were even more badly injured than you dog. You will have to go through a few different surgeries." The doctor said. LJ only nodded while still crying over her little Shadow.



That's it. Man I was even tearing up. If that happened to my dog I wouldn't know what to do with myself.

 

[Dreamoness]

Spoiler: Dream's Submission

Early Sunday morning was the start of our week long appointment with sun and beach. We had everything ready Saturday night so that all we had to do was eat breakfast and head out the door. So, here I was, standing in our white and grey kitchen, cooking up a healthy bowl of cereal. Neither one of us wanted to cook the breakfast we desired so cereal and poptarts was on the menu. As I twisted the lid back on the milk I felt a soft kiss to my cheek followed by a loving hug. I smiled warmly and leaned into the hug before turning to face my boyfriend.

He was 6'2" with stunning dark browon eyes, short black curly hair, and light brown skin. He was on the little extra curves side but at the same time rocking his body by wearing no shirt and some faded blue jean shorts. I bit my lip when he gave me a crooked smile before laying a passionate kiss on his lips. He rubbed my back softly before letting me get my bowl of cereal to the table to eat.

Sitting at the cherry wood table, I watched my boyfriend load our car with our luggage. Smirking to myself I looked down at my almost finished cereal and found a horrifying sight. A dead roach, the size of my thumb, was floating in my milk and I almost threw my bowl. Feeling bile rise into my throat I abruptly least from my chair and rushed to the bathroom. There I was for ten minutes, dry heaving into the toilet as a concerned man rubbed my back. Giving a groan I sat back on my legs and swiped loose strands of brown curls from my face.

After that we hit the road, driving down a long stretch of highway and listening to the radio. Windows down, warm air blasting through the car, and our happy voices singing along to some song was almost like a dream. But like all dreams, they always end at unsavory parts. And this dream had turned into a nightmare.

The flashing lights of police cars, ambulances, and firetrucks lit up the evening sky. Firemen rushed to try and cut through a car that was smashed by the trailer of a semi. Two bodies were stuck in the entangled metal, one who was dead at the moment of impact while the other, me, was barely able to see through the cold darkness. Tears rolled down my cheeks as I realized I couldnt feel my body anymore. I whimpered in fear as my eyes caught a glimpse of firemen moving a chunk of metal before I was suddenly tumbling around. My next and final view was of black asphalt and the horrified expressions of firemen before all went black.

Turns out that a stray chunk of metal from the hood of our car had spiraled through the windshield and decapitated me. So nice the firemen moved this metal my head tumbled across the street and blood shot and sprayed in all directions. It was a terrible sight to see but what was truly saddening was that there was a tiny life inside me that was never going to see the outside world.

 

[DarkestPaladin]

Alright I'll do one of these things..
It's not much. Just messing about.

Spoiler: Paladin's Submission

Two Months Before

"Please, stop, you're embarrassing me!" she squealed in his shoulder, banging his back with her fists and biting at his hair. But her blue friend insisted, grabbing her up by the waist and tugging her roughly through town in naught but her small clothes. Yanked from her house, he'd kicked in each door before he reached hers with a wide, white smile - dirtied scuffed pants and shirtless, like a young brigand. "You'll get us both arrested..!!!"

"Hush with that now, you said you'd buy me new clothes, I am cold! It's winter!"
"You're an ice merandy!!" she snapped, "you don't feel the cold!!!"
"I do so, and you promised you'd buy me new clothes, these are the last pair of pants I've got!" He complained back at her with the same tone. The people around town looked oddly on at the two young people bounding through the market square, barely dressed.

She buried her face in his hair to hide from all the eyes. But there was no use...all that could be seen, had been seen.
He then roughly dropped her onto the cobbled ground, right in front of the tailor's shop and looked down at her with that usual crooked look. For a Merandy, he was very demanding; and skilled with not only magic, but swordsmanship also; which was odd for a Merandy - who usually only used their magic.
"Let's go," he stated, yanking her wrist and pulling her into the half empty shop. She kept her face hidden in the wide sleeve of her silk night robe, and tried to keep tightly wrapped, to cover her small things.
The tailor looked up at the two from his desk with a strange look. The curl of his handled mustache gave an odd twist as his mouth curled in amusement and confusion. It was quite a sight to see two half naked people marching into his shop with such determination to clothe themselves.
".....measurements?" He asked sheepishly.

"Please, he needs a new suit." she spoke, hiding behind the dressing rack covered in lady-like frilly dresses, old chiffon cravats, crinoline cages and moth smelling bloomers. She pointed at her blue skinned friend Yngvar angrily and the tailor nodded, a bit stiff and went to Yngvar to wrap him in fabrics.​

***
​

Of course, when she thought of those days past she felt a sense of melancholy. Everything was much easier back then. Terrisa opened her eyes again as the sun through the leaves began to warm her face. Lying on the ground was stupid, and neither of them was talented enough to survive in the wild. The only thing Yngvar could do correctly was manipulate water...and even that sometimes ended in some sort of accident leading to his unconsciousness. Just the night before he created ice between his fingertips, became so excited at the fact he could create ice (even though he had been doing so for the better amount of his life) and managed to find himself waking up an hour later with a bruise on his forehead. Had he been walking with his eyes open perhaps, and not trying to show off, he would've seen the tree limb aimed for his head.
Terrisa sat up and looked around at their makeshift camp. At least Ander was there; The only other reliable source of brain in the group. He was still lacking a bit in the combat department, but he was a percentage more sane than Yngvar.
She couldn't figure out why she was falling for the crazy blue man anyway...he seemed to have no interest in women at all in the slightest. He definitely wouldn't notice her in the sense she noticed him.

Ander sat up with a groan, his iron helmet still on his head. He sniffed a few heavy times and released a long, exaggerated yawn - stretching and popping his back, adjusting his leathers and eventually getting to his feet. Terrisa, who was already sitting up, watched him slightly as he woke with the light.
"Sleep good?" she asked, not realizing the man had to also remember where he was each time he woke. He jumped, startled and looked in her direction for a moment with wide blue eyes. His peachy skin and dirty brown hair (which couldn't be seen) was no doubt just as flushed as he seemed.
"No." he answered after collecting his wit. His eyes scanned around through his visor, the iron helmet being the last piece of armor he really had at this point. She wasn't sure why he still wore it. "Where's the king?"

She pointed, motioning behind him; Ander turned slightly and was greeted with a shoe with a foot in it. Looking up more he found an entire blue leg and the rest of the body hanging from a low lying limb. At least he still wore the old clothes he always did - even if she bought him new clothes the months before, by this time, they were ruined.
"He was fighting the tree and lost...then he just fell asleep in it." Terrisa shrugged and crossed her arms with a hinting thumb pointing at Yngvar's sword lodged in the trunk just on the other side. Ander shook his head and grabbed Yngvar's ankle, yanking the young king out of the tree and onto the hard ground.
"Time to go!" Ander said as the young man flailed about in the dirty morning grass. He snapped and cussed and sat upright looking at them both. Then he smiled.

"Ah, grand! Let us continue our planned and totally called for adventure." he pointed, stood and brushed the dirt from his matted blue locks. Graciously he grabbed his silver crown from the plain below him and placed it back on his head wear it belonged, yanking his iron sword from the tree and giving it a scowl - as if it should've behaved.

Terrisa sighed and stood up, brushing off the dried grass and leaves from her bum. Everytime Yngvar mentioned their 'totally called-for adventure' she felt sour inside.
They were marooned. Washed up on an island coast last night with no idea where they were. The summer was beautiful, and it would've been peaceful had they not currently been running from the law for illegal practices of necromancy and burning down an entire city killing at least 200 people.
And even before that she was a student in college currently under investigation for suspicion of murder for intention of raising the dead. Meeting Yngvar was like popping a festering blister, only to find out that it hurt more once it was opened. He was a full can of worms, and other things. But she stuck with him and was stuck with him. She couldn't leave him if she wanted to, and she didn't want to. She was afraid if she left him, he'd either get killed or kill himself.
He was also her security... he even broke her out of prison.
"And to think this all started because of summer break..." she sighed, grabbing her small pack and following after Ander who had already headed into the woods.
Yngvar bounded after them, pouting that there was no snow for him to manipulate.
"I hate summer..." he mumbled.​

​

 

[S.Valkrez]

Spoiler: S. Valkrez' submission

D.O.L.L - A Vacation Gone Wrong

Rousseau Himura was in a foul mood, though that was nothing unusual. She was more likely to be in a foul mood than a good one after all, as anyone who knew her the least bit could attest to. This particular wet Los Angeles afternoon had her in an expressively bad temper because of one glaring email from the bureau's human resources, which informed her that because of a new policy her accrued vacation hours were going to expire at the end of the quarter… which was in two weeks.


"What the hell is this?" She demanded, rounding on her partner, Ian Romero, at the next desk. Ian tugged down his opaque headphones and made a confused motion with his hand.


"Wha?"


"This shit with the vacation hours!" She hissed.


Romero stared quizzically back at her long enough to take her temper up an extra notch, and then his eyes widened with understanding. "Oh, you're just now hearing about that? Oh!" He snapped his fingers. "You were on med leave for your cyborg legs when the memo went out."


"You already knew about this?" She demanded, ignoring the jab about her prosthetics.


He shrugged and put his headphones back on. "Yeah. Took the kids to Disney Mountain, got drunk for the first time since Christmas, had sex with my wife. It was a good week."


Rousseau actually curled her lip at the brief mental image of Romero naked and then went back to glowering at her screen. How was she supposed to put together a vacation on a week's notice? And who would she go with?


There was her sister, of course, but Rousseau knew from experience that more than an hour with her older sibling would see one of them dead. There was Romero… and one look over her screen at the other officer covering up a burrito-induced belch with his fist scrapped that idea. She didn't really have friends outside the unit and, since she knew in advance that none of the other officers would waste their vacation leave with the least-likable member, that left her with…


Rousseau blinked, then pushed her palm against her forehead with a low sigh. The only person she had left in her life wasn't even a person at all, and ironically it was also the individual who wanted to spend the most time with her.


"Dee-Zero," she muttered.


=========


Six months ago, Rousseau had been an irritable bachelorette living a life of beautiful solitude in a two-bedroom box of a studio in south LA. Her days between the DEA office, the gym, and home had been routine with little variation, which was exactly how she liked for them to be. Or at least, so she told herself. And then one awful, momentous day she received a present from her older sister which would spoil every part of that careful regiment.


Reagan Himura-Larston not only worked as a bioengineer for Jincom, the leading tech company in the Western Alliance, but was also married to the company CTO which apparently gave her the authority to make executive decisions about products on the fringe of her department. One such project was the D-0-L model L pleasure droid, the absolute newest in in-home companionship and Reagan had decided that her spinster sister was the perfect candidate for the prototype. Afterall, Reagan fit the demographic perfectly: she was over twenty-eight, single, career-oriented, and introverted. The recipe made up the target statistic who bought the previous L-models, and Reagan decided that her younger sister needed something… different in her life.


The result was a minimally marked crate appearing on Rousseau's doorstep, bearing simple instructions and a contractual agreement to not sell or loose the product inside. Rousseau had been outraged and humiliated by the gesture, until curiosity got the best of her and she, against her better judgement, opened the box. What she found inside was a synth girl, lifelike in every conceivable way but for the hexagonal net of amber lighting around her throat. Previous models had had issue with the plastic quality of the skin, or a twitch in the fingers, but Dee Zero had been "practically perfect in every way", from the touch of freckles on her cheeks to the full weight of her breasts to the curls of her mound. It wasn't until Rousseau activated her that the truth of her faults became apparent, and life with the droid had been a slow burning ordeal ever since.


=========


Standing on the Magtram platform and waiting for the next train, Rousseau was dressed in her casual best: a neon athletic top and loose-knit running pants, with her travel bag slung over her shoulder and her trademark glare on the train track. Her short black hair was under a cap, since she wasn't going to be bothered with fixing it when on vacation, and occasionally she shifted her weight between her new prosthetic feet which only added to the look of 'bored douchebag' she was sporting. In stark comparison was the girl beside her, looking to be in her early twenties, with burnished-red curls and a white smile reaching from ear to ear. The girl wore a much more summery-outfit, including open-toed flats and a loose-knit skirt which conflicted with the thick blue scarf she wore wrapped around her throat. Her hand was tucked, almost vice-like, around Rou's and she too stared at the traintrack but with a much more excited expression.


"Mistress, did you know that the Maglev Train runs at up to three hundred miles an hour?" She asked in a pleasant chirp, and Rou rolled her eyes.


"Yeah. I did."


"Oh." The droid's voice fell an octave and Rousseau shuffled her weight. "Did you know that the Maglev Train replaced the comparable Bullet Train in 2030 as the fastest train in the Western Allianc-"


"Deezie," Rousseau growled a warning. "I thought we talked about this: I was going to let you go with me on vacation, and you weren't going to be annoying and happy."


Dee Zero's pout was animated and heart-felt, something which Rousseau was positive she had learned from an old Dreamworks animation and was surely not a result of her original personality profile. It was simply too human, which was a frequent problem she had with Dee Zero.


The droid had many of these personality 'defects', and the only seemed to expand with time. When Rousseau had first pulled the droid out of its box it had been pleasant and informative, but with time it was developing a character of its own, one which was exasperating in its attachment to Rou.


"I can't be happy?" The droid whined in a low pitch and Rousseau actually scoffed, wondering how she was going to wipe that expression off her droid's face. Fortunately, she was saved from the inevitable pout-fest by the approaching train, and she quickly grabbed both her and Deezie's bags to hoist onto the car. She chose to not acknowledge the fact that most people would allow their droid to the lifting work for them, instead of the other way around, and insisted that it was because she did not trust Deezie to have the mental capacity to get their bags safely on the train and not because she felt obligated to take care of the toy girl.


They shuffled onto the car with the rest of the meandering travelers and found a pair of seats half-way down the train. With an excited squeal, Dee Zero hopped into the window seat and plastered her hands to the glass before seeming to realize her behavior. She slowly looked over her shoulder at Rou, an expression which was painfully charming.


"Do you want the window-seat, Mistress?" She asked, obviously hoping that Rousseau would say 'no'.


"You take it," Rou huffed and leaned back into her seat, closing her eyes. "I've seen it all before."


"Do you always go to this resort?" The droid asked, while the train began to shift into motion. "The one on the lake?"


"Pretty much," she yawned back. "It's pretty, it's remote, it's affordable, and hardly anyone goes there this time of year."


"Hmm." Rou did not see how Deezie squinched her nose at that, but soon the train was starting and the woman was drifting off with the lulling whisper of the rail line magnets.


=======


It was an hour later when she felt a tug on her arm.


"M-wha?" She grumbled, sleeply looking around only to find Deezie watching her with her bottom lip pressed between her teeth.


"Um, Mistress? I have.. a problem."


Rousseau just stared at the droid, at a loss. "Wha?" She repeated finally.


"It's my power cell," she winced. "It's low. Really low. I ran a diagnostic and I think there's a malfunction."


Again, Rousseau stared at the droid in confusion, and then sat up. "Your power cell? I thought you ran on a QD solar?" As far as she was aware, that made Deezie's power supply entirely self-sustaining as long as she spent a percentage of her time in a clear light source, and most of the time she ran on an energy storage unit.


"I do…" Deezie winced. "But it's not charging."


"When was the last time it got a charge…?"


This time the droid actually looked down at her feet. "Two days ago," she answered in a guilty mutter.


"WHAT!?" Rou practically roared. Heads around the car turned to stare at her in bewilderment and she grit her teeth, trying to regain her composure. "Two days?" She repeated in a hiss. "Why didn't you tell me earlier?"


"Well, there was that storm in LA and I figured maybe there just wasn't enough clear light to make a charge… and I wasn't sure it was really a problem as long as I used my backup and I guess I.. " she bit her lip again and then tossed her glowing amber eyes on Rou. "I was afraid that if I told you something was wrong with my unit you wouldn't let me go with you on vacation!" Despite the droid's inability to shed tears, there was a definitive sob in her voice. Rousseau was not moved, however.


"You're goddamn right I wouldn't have," she snarled. "How much power do you have left now?"


"Maybe an hour. I was hoping that the unit would start up again now that we're in the sun but I'm just getting a "system error". I'm sorry, Rou!"


"Don't call me Rou," she snapped, pointing a stern finger at the droid. She sighed and rubbed a hand through her hair. They were at least an hour and a half outside of their destination, and if Deezie went offline then Rou would have to carry her to wherever she wanted to transport her to, which would be awkward as well as difficult. Deezie wasn't extremely heavy, but her hardware didn't exactly make her light either. "Shit." She muttered finally. "Well, maybe there's a manufacturer on the way we can go to that can look at your unit."


Deezie bit her lip again.


"...What?"


"Well, Mistress, it's just that… we passed the territory line about twenty minutes ago. And technically… you weren't supposed to take me out of territory." Rousseau just stared at the toy. "So, if we got to a licensed mechanic he'll have to scan my REA code and then Jincom will know you took me out of territory...which is in violation of the NDA you signed when you brought me online…"


The sigh which Rousseau let out was perhaps an entire minute long. "You're just NOW telling me I can't take you out of territory?"


"I thought you knew!"


"Why would I know that?"


Deezie tilted her head, confused. "Didn't you read the terms and conditions of the product contract?"


Rou made a gesture which strongly implied that she had not.


"Mistress, that's very irresponsible of yo-"


"Oh don't talk to me about responsible. You're an android on her last bar of power because you didn't tell you owner you were malfunctioning." Rousseau got to her feet, and Deezie's face shifted to terror.


"Where are you going?" She demanded, hand reaching for Rou's but the woman brushed her off.


"To find the porter and see where we can get off at," she answered and then pointed at the droid. "You stay right there."


Deezie could not have pouted harder, but it did no good as her Mistress lumbered off down the cart. She finally slumped backwards into the faux leather seat and stared out the window at the rapidly vanishing countryside, which she had wanted so badly to see.


========


Rousseau had assumed that the old ghost towns of the nineteenth century had all been demolished, condemned, or otherwise salvaged but as it happened, there were still one or two standing between the Sierra's and the Great Basin. Upon finding out that the train would be stopping at one called Indian Springs in another fifteen minutes, Rou had their tickets updated and dragged the unhappy droid off at the concrete platform, which was an eighth of the size and grandeur of the LA transit station. She ordered them a 'Riide' to an ancient Ramada Inn off what counted as the town's 'main square' and got a key for the low low price of fifty rubles. As suspiciously cheap as the rate had been, Rousseau immediately decided that she had overpaid once she saw their room.


Two full-sized beds sagged in the middle of a room which had the definitive musk of a thrift store. Amenities included an air conditioning box that took up an entire quarter of the lone window, a chest of drawers which was missing two of its four handles and had a mysterious black smear on top, an old LED flatscreen and god help her… a gold-veined mirror above the single nightstand. Deezie gravitated towards the mirror in fascination.


"Wow," she crooned. "Did it break?"


"No," Rou sighed as she dropped their bags on the rack. "Believe it or not, it's supposed to look like that." She grabbed her phablet and handed one of the old fashioned metal keys to Deezie. "I'll be back in twenty minutes. Power down in the meantime."


Deezie took the key but appeared alarmed at the prospect of going offline. "Do I have to? Can't I go with you… wait where are you going?"


"There's a hardware store down the street. I'll be right back."


Dee Zero stared back at her, incredulous. "Mistress, you're not going to try to repair my unit yourself, are you?"


Rou shrugged. "Don't see what other options we have. Just hang tight, I'll be back," she repeated and left the droid in a state of near-panic. Rousseau was many, wonderful things, but she was not a certified Jincom android mechanic....


=========


Deezie had laid herself on one of the beds to be shutdown, which she did so manually since she trusted that Rou would turn her back on when she returned. Normally Dee Zero despised being put offline but occasionally Rousseau insisted… usually when she felt the droid was getting in the way. She wasn't sure how long she was off for but the droid woke to her mistress sitting at the edge of the bed, fiddling with a set of small hand tools.


"Are you 'up'?" She asked, glancing over her shoulder at the droid. Deezie blinked once.


"Yes," she hesitated, running another internal diagnostic just in case the problem had solved itself. Turning off and back on again sometimes worked… but unfortunately not with androids, it seemed.


"Okay, you're going to have to open whichever compartment houses the power supply," Rou was saying as she opened another plastic package.


Deezie grimaced, however. "Um…" she sat up and started to slowly remove her blouse, chewing on her lip in the same way she saw Rousseau do when she was nervous.


"What?" Rou demanded, worriedly.


"It's nothing," she assured with a fake smile and lifted her left breast to press against the synth skin beneath. There was a muffled "click" and a narrow panel, the width of a disk-slot, opened. Rousseau frowned and turned the table lamp to give her a better view as she approached with a tiny screwdriver. "What are you going to do?" Deezie asked quickly.


"There should be a safety panel to unscrew," Rou answered in a distracted tone, letting Dee know that she was focused on the task, but then the woman glanced sharply at her. "Why are you getting weird?"


"I'm not weird, Mistress," she deflected at once.


"Right…" Rousseau began to twist off tiny screw pieces and collect them on the table, while Deezie tried to ignore the unsettling sensation of having her interior examined.


"It's just that… you're inside me."


She snorted. "Dee, I'm inside you like… every other day."


"Yes," she whined a little. "But, not inside me…" she huffed at Rou's chuckling.


"If you say so," she half-agreed and began to insert wires into the interior unit. "It's just that droids don't usually get embarrassed."


"Embarrassed?" She repeated, looking away in thought. "Is that what this feeling is?"


"Sucks, doesn't it?" Rou reached for a device from the hardware store bag and Deezie finally looked down to see what exactly the woman was doing to her.


"Is that an intermediary connector?" She asked, looking at the plastic box in Rou's hand, from which she was feeding wires into Dee's unit.


"Yup," she clicked something into place and then took a thick extension cable from the bag and began to look around the room.


"...Are you going to plug me into the wall?"


"Yup."


"Mistress… you realize that I'm a fifty-thousand ruble Android? And you're going to hook me into a lan-" she blinked as Rousseau clicked the cable into a wall outlet. "Huh."


"Is it working?"


"...Power input is functioning at low but satisfactory levels," she admonished, a bit sullen, then frowned. "But my battery won't accept a standing charge, still." She looked up at Rou. "This is only a temporary fix, Mistress."


In response, Rousseau picked up a solar panel the size of a magazine cover and a quarter-inch thick. "Yeah. We'll have to rig you to this in the morning to get back home. I can take you to my sister when we get to LA."


"Oh. So, I guess that means the vacation is canceled?"


Rousseau huffed and plopped onto the opposite bed, popping a canned beer from a pack which Deezie supposed she must have gotten while on her run to the hardware store. "Well, we missed our reservation and you're broken so yeah. Vacation is canceled, Dee Zero."


"I'm sorry, Mistress," she repeated and sat up on her knees, topless with a selection of cables protruding out of her abdomen. She looked across the room towards Rousseau, who had started to fiddle with her phablet in order to ignore the droid as silent punishment. Deezie began to consider that her mistress must have been rather put off with her, and decided to attempt to salvage what she could of their 'trip'.


"Mistress," she purred, putting weight on one shoulder. "What should we do until tomorrow?"


"I kinda doubt there's anything to do in this town, except for coke and knife fighting," she responded without looking at Dee.


The droid scowled at being so easily rejected, and then started to crawl off the bed. She was still dressed in a skirt but was otherwise nude in her synth skin as she crept to Rousseau's bed, sliding up on her knees to straddle Rou's thighs. She wasn't typically so forward with her Mistress, who prefered to be the one to initiate, but her understanding was that vacations were magical breaks from day to day, and perhaps that included things like sexual norms as well?


"We don't have to go into town," Dee Zee suggested, arching her back some to accentuate her bosom, an effect which was slightly spoiled by the cables stuck in her ribcage. Rousseau peered up at her, one brow arched in an expression of disdain. "I'm a pleasure droid, after all. So why don't we-" she was cut off by a groan from the tired bed under her knees, and then suddenly the corner leg underneath them snapped, tossing Deezie off the bed entirely and nearly upending Rou as well. Half the bed slumped to the floor and Rousseau had to grab the nightstand to keep from rolling to the floor like the droid.


"....What was that you were going to say?" Rousseau asked after several quiet moments.


Deezie, lying where she had landed with her face in the worn motel carpet and her ass in the air, just sighed. "Nothing, Mistress."


==========


Rousseau had gone to the office to complain about the unstable bed and had been offered a different room with two twin sized beds instead. With a frustrated sigh she accepted and moved Deezero and her electronic cable two doors down, which was when Deezie discovered that they were now closer to the hotel pool. It was framed by cacti and at most five feet deep, but the droid was ecstatic. Rousseau had to remind her that she was incompatible with being submerged in water, but the android stared out the window at the cerulean blue regardless while her owner rolled over for a very necessary nap.


By late evening Rousseau was up and hungry, which made her more irritable than ever.


"The only thing that even delivers here is pizza," she grimaced, looking at her phone.


"Pizza is very popular, Mistress," Deezie chirped, swiveling to look at her. "It's a North American favorite."


"Yeah, and it's nothing but dairy and gluten." Rou's trimmed, precise physique was not the result of that combination and she curled her lip at the mere idea.


"Well," Deezie shrugged, ever an optimist (especially when her Mistress was in a mood) "you could ask those people to share."


Rousseau, who was seated cross-legged on the coverlet, looked up at her. "Who?"


In response, she pointed at the glass and Rou glanced around her to see a group of people assembling at the pool outside. Some were setting up at the grill and she even noticed a few kegs being rolled out to what apparently was going to be a party. The attendees looked like local farmers, as far as she could tell judging by their scuffed yellow boots and broad-billed hats.


"Can we go say hi?" The droid asked and Rousseau suddenly realized that Deezie was parading half-naked in the glass.


"Get down," she ordered, getting to her feet. "Goddamnit, Dee Zero." She quickly closed the drapes and turned on the android. "What's the matter with you? They can all see your…" she motioned at the droid, with her glowing neck and exposed, full breasts. So much loveliness was actually too perfect to look real, Rousseau realized.


Dee looked down as well, curious as to what her Mistress was referring to. "Oh, you mean my cord?" She puzzled over the extension cable, as if trying to figure out a way to hide it. Rousseau just rolled her eyes however and went into her bag. She found one of her athletic tops which she had brought along on the trip in case she found time to go for a run. She took the screwdriver from the kit and made a small hole in the side, then began to pull it over Deezie's head.


"No more being topless," she ordered. Briefly, she unplugged the droid so as to fit the cord through the hole and then replugged her again. Deezie looked at her new clothes with a pout.


"It's black," she whined.


"So?"


"I like pink."


For a solid moment, Rousseau thought she was going to put the droid in a choke hold but she resisted, somehow. An old 20 watt amplifier outside crackled to life and a guitar rift screeched into the hotel room.


"Oh wow!" Deezie gasped and went right back to the window, forgetting about her attire. "Mistress, they have music!"


"My fucking phone has music, Deezie."


"Yeah but not 'real' music! Come look, there's a man playing a guitar!"


Rousseau stood, arms crossed, watching Deezie all but wag her tail end as she stared, enraptured out the window at what was happening outside. For a top of the line, state of the art, newest in artificial intelligence, Dee Zero could be exceptionally simple. The thought actually made Rousseau smile, and then abruptly she chuckled at the image of the android poised with such excitement at the window.


"Do you want to go out?" She asked, knowing the answer.


Deezie flipped around so quickly her red hair spun all the way to the opposite shoulder. "Can we!?"


"Yeah, I guess," she relented and grabbed her hotel keys. She propped open the door so that Dee Zero's extension cord wouldn't get stuck and, steeling herself for the ordeal of talking to strange people, went to join the party.


==========


A couple of hours later and the event was in full swing. Rousseau discovered that it was common for the farmers in the outlying orchards to drive in and stay the night at the hotel on fridays, where it was cheaper than DUIs and bars. They made their own weekly club at the hotel pool and after offering to drop fifteen rubles in the community bucket they were more than willing to invite Rousseau to eat their barbecue and drink their pale-ale beer.


Deezie, unsurprisingly, made about ten new friends in under an hour. Despite the fact that she glowed and had a black cord protruding from her chest, the locals found the attractive toy girl infectious. Someone mentioned that the only artificials they saw this far from Vegas were the labor units, which were cold , indifferent, and lacking in any personality. Deezero was the sort of thing someone would see on television however, and being reminded of just how valuable she was put Rou back on her guard. She resolved to not let the doll out of her sight, but fortunately Deezero made no attempt to leave Rou's side. She was eager to meet and talk to people, but her most important focus was always her Mistress.


At about the time the drugs started to show was when Rou put her arm around Deezero and led her to a lawn chair posted beside their hotel door. Deezie slumped happily into her Mistress's lap and curled her head onto her shoulder, watching the party while Rou drank her fifth Solo cup.


"Did you have a good time?" She asked with a slight slur.


Dee nodded back, grinning. "I got to dance and I learned about almonds!"


Rousseau chuckled and put her hand on the doll's knee. "That's good. I guess."


"Mistress, what are those people in the corner doing? They aren't eating."


"They're just snorting," she yawned. "I told you this was a Coke town. It used to be expensive, back in the day, but then the market busted when Trinq was developed."


Deezie looked at her. "Coke? Like, Cocaine? Aren't you a narcotics officer?"


Rou shrugged. "Yeah but they're not hurting anyone and this is a long long way from my jurisdiction. As long as no one tries to attack someone else I'm fine with sitting here and looking the other way."


Dee seemed to accept that logic and went back to laying her head on Rou's shoulder, staring up at the sky from beneath the edge of the awning. She was startled to realize just how many stars were visible, and for a moment she wondered if something was wrong with her visual receptors.


"Mistress," she pointed to get Rou's attention. "The sky looks like the internet."


Rousseau, a bit drunk and well fed, laughed and squeezed the fake girl on her lap. "Yeah, except it's not a stock photo."


"It's really pretty," she remarked in a softer voice. "I'm sorry… that I ruined your vacation."


She shrugged, eyes closing. "It's alright. Tomorrow we'll head home and I'll just ask off a long weekend at the end of the summer. We'll go to Bear Mountain or something for a vacation do-over."


"Really? You'll take me with you?"


Rou opened an eye to look at the doll, who was staring back so happily at just the mention of another trip.


"Yeah. If you can not be annoying and happy."


"I don't think I can do that, Mistress," Deezie sighed pleasantly, nuzzling into Rou's shoulder. "I'm always happy when I'm with you."


Rousseau Himura scoffed and rolled her eyes at the sappy sentiment and attempted to quell the small warmth within her breast that fluttered all the same. Her reservation at the resort had gone to waste, she was stuck in the middle of a desert with cheap beer and burnt hamburgers and a moldy hotel bed with a pleasure android too broken to actually use… but oddly she wasn't her usual dis-tempered self. Oddly, she felt content.

 

[Furanda]

Spoiler: Fur's entry!

It should have been me.

For my twenty-first birthday, I didn't want to go to Vegas. I didn't even want to go to the bar. I just wanted to camp in the woods with a few close friends, try alcohol with them, and have a good time. So last week, the fifteenth of June, we did just that. We went camping like we have every summer for the last fifteen years.

God, I wish we hadn't.

Everything was great. I thought the beer tasted disgusting, but it made everything more fun. The campfire was going, the tent was set up, and Sam, Josh, Ryan, and I were drinking beer. Everything was perfect. Beer, stargazing, and a campfire was all we needed. Truth and dare is a fun game, but it's even more with alcohol involved. Things get a little crazy, you know?

Hide and seek's always been my favorite game. As a small person, I've always had a wide range of hiding places I could fit into. I've won most of the games with everyone ever since we were kids. Sam and the others got height as we hit puberty; I got mad hide and seek skills. It's become something of a tradition, actually, to play a game of hide and seek on my birthday. I think it's Sam's way of trying to make up for growing so much taller than me. Well… was.

I should've known better than to agree to playing hide and seek in an unfamiliar stretch of the woods after dark, especially buzzed. It wasn't that far from our usual camping site, but it was far enough to make a difference.

It was far enough that we didn't know about the gorge.

If you've never been in the woods after dark without a flashlight, it gets dark. Really dark. Everything is silhouettes and shadows, and if there's enough moonlight, occasionally a small bit of detail. The dark makes hide and seek that much more fun. You really have to know what you're looking for to find anyone in the dark, even if you're the seeker and have a flashlight. Everywhere is a viable hiding place if you can get there. Trees, bushes, undergrowth. Anything.

We all agreed on a direction from the tent that we would stick to, set Sam to counting, and scattered to hide. We'd all been in the woods enough that we knew how to move quietly. I angled away from Ryan as soon as I could. My brother's always lived up to being a brotherly annoyance and spoils my hiding places as often as he can. Josh would work with him, so my best chances of winning would be hiding away from them.

It's easy to feel like you've been in an unfamiliar stretch of woods before. Everything looks the same after dark. I thought I knew where I was, but when Sam got close and I started running to try to make it back to camp without getting caught, it turned out I was wrong.

I ran, she almost caught up to me, and that was when I slipped. The gorge seemed to come out of nowhere. One moment, I ran on solid ground, and the next, my feet were skidding down a wall. I caught a tree root by some miracle and held on for dear life.

"Leah? Leah!" The beam from Sam's flashlight swept over the gorge and landed on me as I responded. "Oh my god! Leah! Hold on, I'll get you out of there."

She dropped her flashlight, knelt down, and grabbed my hand. If it wasn't for her, I would've slipped. Because of me, she did. On solid ground again, I clung to her for several moments as I tried to breathe again, and she held me just as tightly. We were so terrified. Then we stood up to head back to camp, and I tripped.

I tripped. How stupid is that?

Sam tried to catch me, she did catch me, and it cost her everything. Her hands disappeared from my arm and I turned around even as her scream echoed. It still hasn't left my mind. I'm on my knees at the edge of the gorge, and I can see her. She's caught herself, barely, about three feet down, and I can just barely see her as a blob of paleness in the shadows. "Sam!" I scream for her to hold on, to not let go, and start screaming for Josh and Ryan to come help us.

I'm on my belly, stretching as far down as I can to grab her hand. I touched the back of her hand. Rock wouldn't have been that warm. I try to grab her wrist, to help her hold on until our brothers get there. I've always been the weakest of the bunch; I can't lift her on my own. Her hand shifts, and I feel her slipping. She's slipping, and I can't catch her.

I can see her staring up at me. Wide, terrified eyes, barely contained sobs drifting up, pleas for me to help her. I'm trying, I'm stretching my arm so far that it feels like I'm pulling it apart to reach her, to keep her holding on for just a few more seconds. Our brothers are close now, crashing through the woods and asking what happened. I can't answer; if I talk, I'll lose my grip.

I still don't want to believe it. My hand slipped. She fell. She fell right before our brothers got there. They heard her scream just like I did, and the crunch that ended it. The silence after.

We heard her die because of me.

Everything after that is a big blur. There was screaming. No answers. Ryan dragged me away from the gorge, I think Josh called someone, and I couldn't pay attention to anything once the tears started. Haven't slept since, haven't really talked. I still can't; I'm too busy thinking about how it should have been me.